Mindless pander within the dome of reason
Bickering more or less with the walls and self
Punishment, punishment: damn you fool
Death and the universe coincide, collide
One being, supernaturally existent
Normally abnormal beyond logic
Dreams of dreams about dreams frolic
Goals pace themselves towards the gulliotine
One little sheep, two little sheep: dead
Oh elusive sleep, why do you not embrace me?
I once knew a girl who thought death
was easier than living a mess of a life.
Her family was stained with meth,
but I told her she had to put down the knife.
She said she had no purpose, no reason
but I pointed out to her the small, pretty things
and told her emotions and feelings changed like seasons,
and happiness would come with the summer the world brings.
She believed me and started to change her ways.
She was so gorgeous when she smiled.
I could press my lips against hers for days.
She was perfect to me, my wonder child.
The girl I once knew was dead, like she wanted.
Rest in peace, she was sadder than she needed to be.
Now with a smile and happy eyes that were once haunted,
I knew this girl had to know what she meant to me.
So I told her I loved her through a text, even though
I wanted to say it in person so I could see the look on her face.
It would have been one of those smiles I love, I know.
And since then I know we've both found our place
Right by each others' sides where our smiles are the brightest.
That's where we belonged, we couldn't fight this.
I was whole when I surrendered to her with a kiss.
I finally learned the definition of eternal bliss.
-qtsp- 6/14
You used to let me roll in the front with you.
With the windows down low.
Music and our favorite shades on.
You would ask me all these questions and id be so annoyed to answer them.
I would help you plant flowers in the backyard and I used to hate it.
There were way too many bugs in the dirt anyways.
We would go and play the lottery together and I remember I won a couple of bucks.
You asked me if I wanted to go collect the money.
I said no because if im going to win, im going to win big.
I got my poetry published and you bought the books.
You made me sign the book and I felt so famous.
You used to sit me on your lap and you used to play this game on my back.
It was relaxing and soothing.
We would cook together and I would bake you sweets.
You used to drive me to my orthodontist appointments and you were so amazed of my braces.
One night I got called in and mommy told me you had cancer.
She held me in my arms and we cried together.
We took a long nap and I felt like shit after.
I tried to see you as much as I could but every time I saw you I would step out and cry in my moms arms.
Then they announced your death.
I swear I died too.
Uncanny and shook,
She took the bait and then ate the hook!
They cut her open and took off every scale,
the breaths she took were short and stale,
Mustering up the energy to get out of this hell,
The death of my fishy came to prevail.
We’re on the brink of brotherhood,
The link is sewed of falling in love
That eventually landed and shattered.
I love you more than I’ve loved before,
The green grass only growing as time goes by.
And I will hold your hand when Death comes calling,
And I will be your light in the dark.
And I will shed tears if you are thirsty,
And in my heart you will always be the first.
You’re a meadow like Death Valley and I’m sick of this drought.
This love is like a labyrinth, with too many traps and too much doubt.
I’ll never be enough for you, but you also don’t deserve me.
I’m either thirsty or I’m drowning, it’s the desert or the sea.
It’s true what they say:
nothing gold can stay.
I gave you a second chance, and you burned it like a bridge.
For a girl who doesn’t care for you and probably never did.
And now you want me in your life, for no reason but to taunt.
I’m sick and tired of feeling exhausted, my heart is nearly gaunt.
I’m gray inside and probably out, although you haven’t noticed yet.
You’re probably too busy fucking her in your liberal college bed.
I hope she makes you happy, and then she breaks our heart.
Maybe you’ll learn the lesson you’ve needed from the very start.
That probably is cruel of me, but I’m sick of karma’s sleeping.
I never did one wrong to you, but life always has me weeping.
People aren’t playthings, and are not at your dispense.
You’ve lost your goodness and humility, and probably common sense.
I’m walking away free and clear, out of this labyrinth of uneven care.
Maybe my footprints will prove to you how it isn’t fair.
You’ve lied and you’ve cheated and you’ve broken my heart thrice.
And here you are, free and clear, isn’t that so nice?
I hope you live a good, long life, and I hope you do things great.
But I also hope you grow up before it’s too late.
So as you examine all the sand and sea and wonder what went sour,
I’ll be laughing and dancing and feeling alive instead of sobbing in the shower.
Do not take this as bitterness, for I see our past as sweet,
But don’t fuck around with fire if you can’t take the heat.
Sinking and sinking
I question my dreaming
The constellations swallow me
Suddenly I am nothing, everything
Everyone relies on me
My fingers pinch the sun
Drag it to the one
I bring the dawn
Yet thrive in the night
Falling and falling
I ponder my longing
To fall from the sky
From so mighty high
Wonder when I hit the ground
If it will make a sound?
All I feel is emptiness
All I feel is desolate
Arms out to catch myself
Lingering on your last breath
All I feel is worthless
All I feel is emptiness
Crashing and crashing
I embrace the fall
I kiss the ground with my body
and wait for my soul
Will it evacuate the emptiness?
Does it even exist?
Soaring and soaring
My mind is
And it lingers
On every moment I hated you
Can't nobody hate you like I do
I hope you feel guilty
As my world is closing in
Yet the commotion around me isn't sinking in
I can hear the whispers
Calling in the night
Tempting me to do
What I think I might
Breathe and breathe
I attempt to, but do not strive to
Death is not my fear
That would be you being near
Don't touch me
Someone does, checks for pulse
But I am already flying
I shoot into the sky, back up, arms out
Im crying out
Reaching, grasping, failing
To touch the body I once inhabited
I know I was not meant to be
So why do I feel sadly?
The hearts content
I say that dont please her
Happiness is on her face
As the man greets her
His voice is just dance, just colors
On an empty canvas
A bit of something inside
A little of me, a little of her
I am the demon
The soul whisperer
The one who tells her to do it
Dancing and dancing
My demon whispers to him but I still move
Who is in control?
Who holds the ropes?
I dont think I can save myself
I'm drowning here please
Somebody help?
Digging and digging
My demon knows it all
Her silky, snaky voice surrounds everything
I am suffocating
Although I am already dead
I shall live forever with her in my head
Bloodied and broken on the cruel, paved ground,
Life slowly slipping away.
In awful, violent, glory he’s crowned,
A martyr of the fray.
His story draws life,
On muralled walls,
With those who fell before him.
Adorned in green, white, and gold,
His community come to mourn him.
let's get our heads checked
we need a head check
where's the doctor in the house?
we're lost in this madhouse
everything is wrong with us
we came here carrying the bus
we know we have problems
as always, someone else's problem
that's ever been our only sad excuse
never knowing it's a crumbling refuge
it started with sticks and stones
here we are ensuring its all gone
calling it progress
these comfort cages
modern civilization
more like creeping annihilation
[or is that speeding destruction?]
back to sticks and stones, we'll begin
[can i hope for something else?]
back to sticks and stones, we'll begin
[can i hope for something else?]
this dance of death
let's begin this dance of death
Even if your hands were stealing my breath
I'd still love you to death
every kiss is a weakness
every touch is a must
deadly love affair
tainted with lust
cold hearted
with a charming soul
the kind who could make me
lose all sense of self control
a devil who could possess
a lover who could excite
as well as depress
Even with your hands around my neck
I would still love you to death
until I lose my final breath
