We've all seen old Santa Claus
On his sleigh of colours bright
He flies around the world in it
And he does it in one night
But, have you truly seen it
I mean, the colours on the sides
Have you ever really noticed
Santa's fancy ride
I've seen it in the shopping mall
Down here it's shining red
But, that's a store designers choice
It's a colour from their head
I've seen the sleigh in different hues
I've seen it all in green
It's never really all the same
Do you now see what I mean?
Certain countries of the world
Do not allow some hues
Some are just for royalty
And some are just bad news
A black sleigh, never seen the like
Santa wouldn't ride in that
It would just look like eight reindeer
Being chased by a big bat
Blues, and yellow, red and white
There's choices to be made
Depending upon where he is
It takes on a different shade
I prefer the red one
It's my favorite, I must say
But when you look at all the colours
There is fifty shades of ...sleigh!!!
Could vous just take a second, a moment, one solid instant
to visualize the boy in the stall with more felt lacerations than words of admiration.
Could the bold, bright, beautiful ones start singing
because I'm sick of the loud talk that goes through the motions of lingering
in an echoed room as they "try" to save the oceans - tell me, did we
litter on the way there? There's a forgotten world in stories told of heroes, breathing clean air.
Could the world give one more shot (a mountainous event) because history needs valor.
But technology is further than requirements for bravehearts to trigger a gun. Envision
a man four foot high, who stands a flag where poppies lie because he was that lucky man
who watched his fellows die
I'll say, weaponry wields death to We, naught could prove me wrong.
Could the world be a little bit more tight; bring back the mystery of gentlemen.
We're too loose and on the edge of loss, and the cost - oh, the cost
is sentimentality that somehow became disconnected when
baring your soul and stripping bare became two
and when I meet the one, my mind is plagued that we shall only amount to half.
Could the world be about more than the new, the sophisticated
or have too many eye closed to the life before the Dodo's died; now only
one view: to screen the disease from the rescued swingers, sinkers and singers
ahhhhhhhhh! basking in captivity: to compensate, we take back by metabolizing habitats.
Could the world be about to - because me and mine are everywhere,
but mind: the brain's likely to reach revelation. Clap, we will excel. After all,
when the world explodes and we reconnect, I'm sure each will preach and teach and leech
until it's known - We'll thank Gutenberg as needed, but printer is no master
when the minds are intertwined. But P'haps it has been a bad morning because I've known you
and you've bled true - long been fixing those around, so they aren't torches who warn off monsters,
instead they shave down fangs of loathing, there's no - not one! - beast they burn.
And don't I wonder? Ah yes, I do wonder: that now
Could the world be about to turn?
I watch you more closely now, more than ever
the way your jaw sits, almost as if you're angry
but I know you're not, you're thinking about me
and the way my lips are curving into a wide smile
I'm smiling because you told a bad joke
which has always been your specialty
you're the boy I've been chasing after for a long time
even when I thought I had reached the stars
you were still the one that slipped into my dreams
and no matter what I say to myself
you will still be the one that I will want
through thick and thin
you were the one
I always wanted to win
I am crying because these tears are the words I will not say.
I sob because leaking out of my eyeballs is every goddamn sentence I held inside while we were fighting.
All I keep iron lipped locked up lest I explode everything with the velocity of feeling,
of pure gas fire explosions of all these secrets I keep bouncing around the inside of this concrete skin.
And just for a moment,
I don't want to apologize to anyone about
what chemical reactions are taking place in my twisted brain.
I don't want to "work things out" or "talk it through"
or yell or scream or vent to people because no one knows what to say or do except hugging
but I'm all alone in this dark room, dehydrating myself and curling into a ball small enough to fit in your chanel purse,
And I don't want you to wrap your stiff arms around me.
That's when I don't want anything more than just to collapse,
to slide into pieces and fold them all on top of each other until I can absorb into something simpler,
something that doesn't have heavy feet sentencing her to a lifetime of traveling these warped roads-
or maybe someone who can deal with the world without turning all of it into a poem,
a girl who doesn't have to fake forgiveness for rides to practice and isn't forced to worry about crossing lines and homework or turn signals or disappointing adults and landing standing tucks and being sharp at football games or homecoming dates and not pissing off my stupid "friends"-
Along with all the other everyday irrelevance that won't mean anything in 25 years.
What do I even care, anyway?
Does anyone actually care?
Isn't it all just bullshit?
But as my phone rings and rings unanswered and my doorbell stays silent
I must come to the conclusion that I am just another human being having the same damn emotions as everyone else and that, in fact,
My friends don't want to hear once again about that fight my mom and I have been waging on and off for about 3 years and how it literally drains my will to live and worms holes in my mental health.
I must not be that girl who pities herself-
the one who lets her watery-gray sadness spill over the sides and splash into other people's laps, bringing down lighthearted conversations on the quad about homecoming dresses
For God's sake, Gabrielle
keep your shit to yourself.
Splash your face with water, spray a little febreze, fetch your plastic bags and fake smiles.
No one likes a bad smell.
isn't it such a delectable pleasure to have secrets?
To relish, to roll in, coil up and into all your little hidden truths and sigh with contentment-
because who can hurt you when they don't know who you really are?
When every insult they think drives a knife straight into the kidney simply bounces easily off a warm, cipherous coat-
isn't that just a lovely, safe feeling?
I delight in the inner smirk that smoothed across my conciousness as I glance around at my teachers in my honors classes and think,
none of you know what I did last weekend
I will squeeze these secrets like wether's originals,
savoring every bit of pleasure from the vaguely illegal and scandalous-
I have come to the conclusion that I do bad things every now and again just so I can enjoy not telling anyone about them
i’ve been trying
to sleep away
every bad thought
every ill omen
every second of my futile existence
but i sleep
a dreamless sleep
in the box is moldy
and i wonder if i’m hungry enough to
scrape it off
each day i wake up
and eat the
so you don’t have to worry about
i have the sun in my belly
it casts shadows on my bones
when i was
a kid i used
to suck on pennies ‘cause
i could get some good luck from it
i remember running
in the grass bleached
evergreen by the summer
and i let
the sun out of my belly
so everybody else could
and now i sulk with the moon
and i don’t care
i don’t care about anything
so when luna says i
should get out more
i say “fuck you.”
some things in life
are pointless and
i am some of them
you told me you worry
you're not really good
if you're drawn to bad people
were you wondering why you ever liked me in the first place?
old fashioned cigars
the size of your fist
and knuckles bruised
the colors of the side of your neck when i kiss you
waiting for your own lungs to tar
and to trade the colors infused
in your neck
for a pair
just like mine
you don't want to be kissed anymore
you want to start kissing
waiting for someone to
til your skin molts
and your bones tingle
but you have to stop waiting
to teach you what that's like
we're all villains anyway
you're not really good
if you're drawn to bad
why do you think you were drawn there in the first place?
but i have something to tell you
from one villain
morals come from heaven
because no one has a conscious
so i'll play the villain for you
kiss necks till they're bruised
maybe throw a punch or two
and when you finally realize
your definition of bad
love, tar lungs, and
i only ever punch holes
you victimized sadness
and after you read this poem
i want you to tell me
can you even give me a clear definition of bad anymore?
You should do it, you know
Loose yourself in the blades
No one would notice or care
Don't you have any shame?
Some one would care about her
Don't tell her different
Please don't kill us
Don't leave us
You're worthless, I swear
Death would be easier and simple
Don't you think so, Kaitlyn?
Just a few slices here and there
But you have life to live
And experiences to be had
I promise it will get better soon
I know life is bad
Ha, it will get better
If you pop a few dozen and wait
I promise it will get better soon
If you just stop breathing
No one wants you
Not true! I promise people do
Oh, like who?
Mom, what about mom?
She would live
Bull shit, it would break her
What friends does she have?
Plenty and you know it too
Hah, can hardly call people
Who say they'll be there
But disappear friends
People have lives that don't
Revolve around her
But when she needs them
They never show
How is that friendship?
Words aren't always needed
To show love
I'm done listening to this
Leave me alone I
Need to think
And I can't do that with
You two in my head
Whatever, I'll be back
Okay, but remember
We're always here
Yeah I know
That's the sad part...
These past few months I have been going through
many hours of '' soul searching '' walking around
through '' dark hours ''
Then in my vision of first-glance feeling on a
New York Time
Back when you fit in my poems like a perfect rhyme
I held on to what once was true before I lost You
in a cloud of blues
I know Jehovah is with me even when the ''dark cloud''
that engulfs me , I know I must endure it until
This pain gets removed from my mind from my heart and soul ,
'' darkness, '' is something I do not miss
I was hurting so bad it almost taken me down
And right there where I stood on holy ground
That is when '' Jehovah '' taken my heart and made me
New again ,Taken my ''darkened'' hours of pouring showers
Spinning like a girl in a brand new dress feeling so blessed
the noise ''of your '' Voice '' with the sound of ‘I need you’,
And for the first time I had something to lose,
I guess we fell apart in the usual way
But that is on a beautiful ''faded '', day when ''Jehovah ''
made way to my heart and washed that ''darkened ''
memory away when it comes to you
the story’s got dust on every page of gray of every sad
word you ever had to say on that ''cold ''winters day of ''gray''
Tonight I'm gonna dance I'm going to dance out in the pouring rain
Calling on ''Jehovah's '' name to wash away those nasty ''darken '' pains''
I am good never looking down because where I am at is on '' holy '' ground.
Nothing to do,
But spill tears on this page
Nothing to do, I guess,
But cry all day.
Nothing to say,
When i say too much
Nothing to say,
When I'm loosing lust.
Nothing to care for,
But the little things I love,
Nothing to care for,
But the stranger I love.
Nothing to write,
When everything I do's a mistake,
Nothing to write,
When my life's about to go in flames.
In flames up or down,
I wouldn't want to say,
Down or up, my thoughts all day.
Will you be sad with me?
I shouldn't have asked.
Will you help me through?
Or is it, "Too great a task?".
I have two sides,
The bad, the good,
My mind considers both,
But the bad figures it could.
The good shines some light,
Just enough if i need help,
But not enough, never enough,
That will ever shroad the doubt.
Why do people get famous,
For such stupid things
Why are some people popular,
Why does no one know
Well, I guess that I don't want them too
I keep a thick layer of snow.
Why is this at-all beautiful,
It's one of the sadder things I"ve wrote
But i guess, when you go high,
It's never the prettiest note.