I remember when you told me my body would rot,
and I agreed. I remember when you told me I am
nothing. I agreed, and said it back. You are nothing
to anyone else but me. I will not leave. You first,
please. And you agreed. God my feet were bare
and you loved me, last. Early to bed, five A.M.
I didn't sleep. I remember when I told you
we have lived before. And will live again.
And you replied, we are nothing. And I said no,
you are nothing to anyone else, you are nothing now
to me. I want to help you bleed, but you scab over
too quickly. I will not agree. I am more to me
than I am to you.
Loving him was a game of playing Simon Says
That's why I had to obey when he said "get into bed"
"Simon says do this and do that"
I followed his commands
But even an obedient girl couldn't meet his demands
"Stay here with me" but he didn't say Simon says
And when I did, I lost the game in the end
as obedient as my cat
who waits for me at the door
and jumps to kiss my tired feet
from a hectic long day
standing at lecture rooms
as obedient as my cat
who climbs excitedly on my bed
and licks my feet again
at the break of dawn..
just to inform me..
"wake up silly lady...
Its time for a morning prayer"
as obedient as my Harry
who sits next to the praying mat
and patiently observes
and waits till a prayer is done..
What a sweet way to start a fresh new day...
with an obedient four legged son called Harry
who is loyal and cute in his
own sweet way....
Even through your sufferings, especially through your sufferings.
Put others first, this is the way to reveal Christ living within you.
This is how Christ want us to live, by putting others before one self.
Especially while we are hurting the very most, this reveals Christ.
Because Christ love is not like a sink faucet or shower head.
That may be turn on and off whenever we chose to love others.
But its an action that shall be shown always through us.
I am like a dog trapped in a cage by society. Society is my owner. Telling me not to leave the cage even when the door is wide open. They give me commands. Sit. Stop. Stay. They tell me what to do. Every time I’m fed up with society and I try to speak out, they yell. Stop barking! Be quiet! So I do. I am quiet. Outside that cage is a world. The cage is unlocked. I can get out, but I don’t. They tell me to stay in the cage because the world is harsh and cruel. They tell me it’s for the best and for my own safety. So I obey my owner because I was trained to believe society is always right. They set rules for me and I follow. That is why I feel trapped. I can easily go. I have a choice but instead I sit and follow my orders. I don’t speak out. I don’t stand out. I just sit and stay. They all think I’m quiet and secretive and shy. I’m not. That isn’t the real me. There is a difference in who I truly am and who they believe I am. They made me that way. Just like the way cruel owners make a dog mean or lifeless.
I was taught to be obedient
I imagine the outside of that cage is a life worth living. We live in a beautiful world. I’m just too scared to see it because that cage hides the truth. That cage is filled with fears and anxiety because of what my owner says about the past, the present and the future of my life. I just don’t know what the world truly is. I don’t really know what I truly am either.
But for now, I guess I am just a dog trapped in a cage by society. Scared of what’s beyond my cage.