I had an epiphany
It was so strange
I was looking at everything in a different way
Nothing was wrong with me!
I suddenly realized
There's something wrong with everyone else, not I!
I still may not be beautiful or perfect or anything
But I do know that there isn't a damned thing wrong with me
I figured it out, and nearly gone insane
But it numbed me instead of exploding my sanity
I felt everything and nothing
My mind was moving and wondering the same things
The answers unknown
The questions never asked
Nothing made sense, because people's brains are dead
They would say I'm insane for everything in my head
Drop your preconceptions of me at the door
Who do you see?
Not the person that was there before
I just always wanted a chance
To prove that I was something different
Than who you thought I was
But I only need to prove it to myself
I see that now
I am me
And you are you
I don't need anyone's acceptance but my own
Because, after all, above anyone else
We need to be able to live with ourselves
I wish i had one.
I wish passing by someone or something
I'd see things more clear
No hate, no concernes, no envy, no fear.
Just a light ride
I'm stuck in the silence of my own body
My mind is running wild
I'm like a tornado inside a a house made of glass
A peculiar and uncanny epiphany.
What is life?
I am uncertain.
Is this all we live for?
We hate so freely but limit our love
We judge so instantly but never try to fully understand...
...but what is there to understand?
Is peace out of the question?
Does serenity not exist?
If the masters of war stopped, would all violence cease?
That is what I want to know.
Because I am uncertain of my peculiar and uncanny epiphany.
my phone beeped
in an almost deserted train compartment.
'where have you reached?'
I sighed and replied,
'should reach in 5'
(would reach in 20)
same old dance
to the tune of corporate slavery.
a sharp sound,
I looked up.
the sound dissolved
into a fit of giggles.
a group of kids
playing around, teasing,
their mother close by;
a hawker, selling trinkets in the train.
it looked so natural.
a working mum
looking after her kids while on the job
(doesn't work that way does it?
guess they didn't have anywhere safe
I couldn't look away.
it was such a sight...
torn, tattered clothes
dirt and mud all over
and those innocent giggles;
it didn't add up.
I was tired, aching,
infatuating about sleep;
feet bleeding in killer heels,
rushing around without purpose,
forced into an exploitative overtime job
by myself; frustrated,
trying to keep up with society.
the little family
torn, tattered smiles held with grace,
facing their exploitative poverty
with innocent mischief and honest labour.
I had a thought:
that's the life they've known,
this is the life I've known.
we fit in our lives...
we fit in different lives in the same way.
I struggle she struggles,
we both have good bad days.
I didn't realize I was smiling
till she smiled back.
I bought something
and got off at the next stop,
wishing she has more good days than bad
and the kids keep their giggles
a little longer than they can..
Instead of for you,
This is for me. I’m allowed
to be selfish once in a while.
I’ve been too hung up on you;
my head has been in the clouds.
I haven’t seen my feet or felt the ground,
but I’m in no rush to get back. My head
is light, it feels clear. My transparent
goals are more visible than ever. I can
almost reach them with phantom limbs.
I’m adapted to the air up here, but
I am still not satisfied. The only thing
that stimulates me other than you
is only felt through my soul. The notes
on this bridge—like the one on your back—
serenade me into delusion I don’t want to
wake from. If I could sing forever, my ears
would be heaven’s gates. Rings that wail,
delay and distort, bouncing from wall to
wall before beating my ear drums and
sending my nerves on a six foot wave
adrenaline foaming at the edge
breaking the tangible, dissipating
the mundane, cracking the film of
reality like a rock against a windshield.
It is calling me, I can hear its echo,
seismically en route to plant the seed.
I must listen — this sound I must heed
My destiny lies within my fingertips,
where all my convictions will seep.