Yesterday I heard more reasons why I didn't get a response in a proper time frame. I was shocked as this is not a relationship more like a game. I found the reasons not to be excuses. I liked hearing why I was put off, which I am not used to. I am very used to be put off and set aside without a word to help guide my mind as to why. I hate that it leaves me wondering WHY???
Yesterday helped me see clear what it is I have to do here.
You showed me more consideration in one day than he did for his entire stay!
I wonder now how the fuck I could chase someone down who has no interest when I am around. I have been left to wonder, to wander around town. I am rather seething that I was not even told you were leaving notice I am not receiving ...so much consideration..not found
So I want to take the time to thank you. I saw what it is I need, so thank you. I now see a flaw in his perfection. And now I do not feel so much rejection ; )
The following statements of truth were brought to you
Not through, but circumnavigating fated parameters
Of insane, yet normative, largely uninformative
Mechanisms that formally give birth to bullshit;
And instead, strategically splicing said bounds with
Ideal variables derived from the courageously quixotic,
Unrobotic, and outraged agents of, and for, capital Real:
The train of corporate reasoning derails so fast
To follow is to snap the head backward,
Far past angles within measures of pleasurable fit
And open gates to deluging tangled circular
Failures of logic that trick and co-opt the proletariat.
We are Present-Ambassadors with broken flux-capacitors
Demonstrating a consistent tendency toward error
In efforts to obtain diplomatic access to a future where
The same reemerging deficits do not manifest unfixed.
One of said deficits may include all positive freedoms.
For the record, it shall be noted that civil society
Currently arrives implicitly to find it compliantly fine
To promote systems of labor designed to illicit behaviors
That will eventually undermine the actors of exhaustive work
And make benefactors of those complicit in crime.
As case studies of this paradoxical paradigm, we observe
Nations signing trade agreements aligned with
Selling more of the goods whose extractions have
Cataclysmic exactions upon locals contracted not to resist.
Those who take issue with this are directed to appellate institutions.
The projected scarcity of over-consumed poisons causes fear
Which leads to faster hoarding and more ex(t/p)ensive death.
Thus, most human behaviors presently inflate pricing, popularity,
And rapidity associated with committing system-wide suicide.
As shackle-some power consolidation bends toward a transnational peak
I hereby slide-tackle these forwarded trends, seeking goals of the rational.
Say when in a heartbeat will
light dwindle down to the
dance on a taper and mirror-eye
Say how long a lifetime im-
possible it's quite im-
(expecting that wilted
red flower sunk into
its vase to rise up and smell as
I cannot decide
whether it is about living
living in the best way
should I act boldly
are risk irrelevant
because mere action
is priceless in
these things I wonder
as I sit alone
after doing something
but it was fun
and that, perhaps,
is what life is all
I am a Fuster Cluck
I am mother-duck
Color my medically mental psychiatriosis
Snowball my eyeballs into your throat-hole
"I never asked for this," said Adam Jensen's blow-hole.
I feel best self medicated on that fire-water's chest
Feel my insides warm as my outsides loosen
I may explodinate my thought bubble-quotient
I'm sick of being in my head
Worrying about you, worrying about life
Lay it at the foot of the cross
I know which one
So why am I sitting here holding all my problems in my arms
Cradling them like a small child?