Michael W Noland
Michael W Noland
Dec 7, 2013

I got vinegar in my mouth
And acid under my nails
I will leave you without doubts
And point out all our fails

I got antennae in my nose
And satellites in my ears
I look against the flows
And pluck out all the years

I got thorns around my heart
And a forest on my gut
I love from the very start
And finish what I fuck

Named by a random facebook commentor

Everyone loves a pussy. We can shave it
then decorate it with a merkin,
a cute furry pubic wig that comes in a myriad
of styles, animal, vegetable and insect shapes
including Ginger Minge, Man Eater, Hairy Mary,
Fuzzy Wuzzy and the bestselling Chicago O'Hair
International Airport Landing Strip.
A man must resist smirkin at her merkin
and pretend it's not there like he pretends
her starfish encircled asshole is just a tight pussy
and the brown color on the tip of his penis
is just a streak of chocolate fudge with which
to paint a Mexican bandito mustache on her face.
Make no mistake, even if her fuzzy wuzzy
wasn't fuzzy under her carpet, you won't
find Captain Nemo inside her starfish as your 6 inch
sub explores the depths 20,000 leagues under her ass.
Maybe one day they'll have asshole merkins
with the faces of celebrities or politicians with
their mouths wide open gaping in a state of wonder.
We can only hope.

This is somewhat of a parody of the prose poem style of Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Award winning poet, Philip Levine.

For my related 'pussy' pieces please visit:
The Pussy Song: World's Dirtiest & Most Outrageous Poem
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-pussy-song-worlds-dirtiest-most-outrageous-poem/

Kids Say the Darndest Things: "Hey little fella', what can Santa get you for Christmas?"
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/kids-say-the-darndest-things-hey-little-fella-what-can-santa-get-you-for-christmas-1/

Celebrity Pussies: Cosmo's Field Guide to the Perfect Squish Mitten
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/celebrity-pussies-cosmos-field-guide-to-the-perfect-squish-mitten/
..and the complementary parody:
Cosmo's Guide to Snapping Hot Cock Shots for your Online Profile
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/cosmos-guide-to-snapping-hot-cock-shots-for-your-online-profile/
.
#love   #strange   #blue   #fuck   #candy   #kitty   #hair   #ill   #hole   #hot   #cut   #cherry   #fish   #cave   #wizard   #prison   #pink   #muffin   #promised   #open   #lady   #woo   #piss   #birth   #eye   #wound   #moose   #lip   #bottom   #canoe   #tunnel   #bang   #boat   #box   #clown   #c   #pussy   #trending   #pie   #ham   #land   #sleeve   #v   #cunt   #vagina   #punani   #snatch   #snizz   #trim   #twat   #poon   #clit   #gash   #foot   #front   #pookie   #ninja   #cookie   #slit   #bat   #cannon   #meat   #mound   #toe   #cock   #axe   #badly   #wrapped   #kebab   #bald   #bean   #bearded   #clam   #oyster   #beav   #beaver   #beef   #curtain   #waffle   #bread   #burger   #buju   #flaps   #camels   #camel   #chach   #cha   #chocha   #cho-cho   #chonch   #choot   #clunge   #pocket   #cooch   #coochie   #coosie   #cooter   #cuder   #cunny   #punt   #curtains   #cutty   #socket   #fanny   #flap   #mitten   #taco   #flange   #fur   #gap   #growler   #wallet   #hatchet   #hoo-hoo   #na-na   #incision   #jute   #kooch   #kuder   #lunchmeat   #mangina   #minge   #knuckle   #muff   #nappy   #dugout   #neden   #pudding   #sausage   #velvet   #poonaner   #poonani   #poontang   #tang   #pootang   #pooter   #pootie   #punanni   #puss   #quif   #quiff   #quim   #quivering   #roast   #smush   #soggy   #sprained   #tampon   #vadge   #vag   #vagoo   #vajayjay   #vertical   #whispering   #whisker   #biscuit   #woogit   #wugget   #wuss   #nookie   #purse   #poo   #jonesing   #beefcurtain   #coo   #hooded   #kooter   #meatwallet   #putang   #pu-tang   #twitchet   #vagine   #va-jay-jay   #vajizzle   #merkins   #vajazzling  

I don't appreciate
bleeding for nine days straight
Flow so heavy I wanna die
at the silliest things I start to cry
the annoying things never made me twitch
but now I just go full bitch
I just lie around like a lump
And everything, I want to hump
Simply, I have no motivation
Golly Don't I hate menstruation

A designer vagina
Micheal Wolf
Micheal Wolf
Apr 4, 2013

A designer vagina
A nip and a tuck
A trim of the curtains
A tightening up
A complementary adjustment
A tidying of bits
Matches the uplift
You had on your tits
So 6 months it took
To create the perfect snatch
Only to find he's left you tonight

Watched a documentary were and I quote "I had my saddle bags lightened and my tints re aligned" only for her husband to leave her.
The Vagina.
DarkBeautiful
DarkBeautiful
Apr 20, 2010

The Vagina.
They say that beauty is in the eyes of the
beholder, however the vagina
is a gold mine.

Women do not even know
what their possess
many a nation have gone to war,
because of this ugly beauty,
the seven hundred wives of
King Solomon and his three
hundred concubines
a great example of what
the ugly beauty can do.

Infidelity is on the rise,
so many lies,
since the vagina is an embarassing subject
why men lie and killed for it,
For this remarkable commodity

A vagina is like a Van Gogh painting,
it gets lot of attention.
A weapon so powerful
It can break a man down to his lowest
it has a language of its own.
silly words like sup, sup, sup. during loving making
However, that was supposed to be the primary appeal
of a beer to men.

The vagina and a beer have so much in common
they both get their men all the time,
a smooth transportation,
in addition, the lamentation,
Vagina you are surely number one!
Men incredible dreams,
No matter how destructive or fulfilling,.

.

Dark@beautiful/or Darknlovely
My vagina betrays me
Margo
Margo
Feb 13, 2013

My vagina betrays me
It yearns to be touched, kissed, caressed
Drawn to the point of ecstasy
But perhaps lingering at the edge
To relish the pleasure for a moment
A moment
Longer

My vagina betrays me
Always wanting more
More
More
Never consolidating with the others parts
The brain
The heart
And we are not speaking in terms of anatomical correctness
No, but in terms of
Emotions
I said it

My vagina betrays me
My heart yearns
They argue
The heart wants intimacy, human touch, connection
The feeling of looking into the eyes of another and knowing
In that instant
That second
That moment
Everything is okay
And even if it isn’t
It doesn’t matter
Nothing will matter
Except
This
Moment

My vagina betrays me
My heart yearns
And they argue
But my brain
My logic
The voices within
They speak up, naturally of course
Please the vagina for the night
Intimacy
Ha
Intimacy
Have you looked inside
For your insides are as hideous as the out
Do not believe otherwise

My vagina betrays me
My heart yearns
They argue
But my brain
My brain does the most damage
It controls them all
The betrayal, the yearning
My brain betrays me
My brain wants what it cannot ever have
My brain desires things so far from its reach
My brain imagines the impossible
Love

My vagina betrays me
My heart yearns
They argue
Then my brain
My brain goes off
Thoughts passing by at the speed of light
Each one, so very important
My brain is in charge.
It supplies the salty wetness that falls from my eyes
The emptiness I feel within

My vagina betrays me
My heart yearns
They argue
But my brain
My brain destroys all
My brain burns the cities down
The dreams
Dashed against the rocks
My desires
Meaninglessly quenched
My emptiness
Forever there

My brain betrays me
My brain yearns
And within, is an argument
Within
Within is the problem
No one will ever know, So fear not
Let the brain betray
Let it yearn
For the mouth
Perhaps, that is who really is in charge
The mouth shall not betray
The eyes may
The eyes do
But who catches them long enough to see inside?
No one has, No one will

My brain betrays me
My brain yearns
An argument, within
But my mouth
Shall
Never
Betray
Me
It shall remain closed
Sealed tight
Strongest of clay bricks
Guarding my secrets
Guarding what lies within
The confines of my soul
Emotions

Emotions betray me
Emotions yearn
Emotions cause me to argue within
But my mouth
My
Mouth
Shall
Remain
Loyal

Sarina
Sarina
Feb 10, 2013      Feb 11, 2013

I tripped on a forest of roots & lost my clothes.
When this happened, I felt less a lady
in shame of uncovering from pink, frilly things

the shelter like feathers on a peacock or
ribbons track-marking a braid –

I was enclosed in such a house that I must have
become it myself. Nude, I saw tiger-stripes
eating their way from my hips to bottom
and made a big taproot, a radix to the physical

me, as rosy as a flower in the dead of spring
even billowing as petals will for wedding vows –
the single, womanly cavity I concealed

how together we became such a dollhouse
for nature and its pubic hair:
I, taught to play with my own frilly, pink thing.

Moshew Snurff
Apr 6, 2010

My oh my , dear oh my
Why sole me , deliberate shy
Arrouse me in meself inner sanctum
To cause penises go wild erectum

Why me frail and naive
Touched and grabbed feels so tactile
Breached and pinched gets me unleashed
Fortold and shadowed narrows me leached

Oh how i humble and crumble for pain
Pleasuring may not be enough, but not in vain
Showering me until it rains
Pumping my blood through my veins

Widely and unique i scorge and emerge
Make me cum till i purge
Bright and shiny i humbely traverse
For a non-stoping reverse

Fred Reade
Sep 15, 2013

No reason to be precious about it,
it's best to just be blunt,
she's got a helluva cunt.

I could wax poetic, swooning like a
love-drunk boy, but what's the point?
Sharing, expressing, defining the spell
is futile. Sex with her is like
dancing with god.

Finally, at fifty, I feel the
vibration of lovesongs.
Not in my ears, deeper than any sense can taste.
Lost for hours in life, in bonding; finally
knowing the only knowledge worth knowing

She teaches by just being.
Responding, absorbing, inspiring,
implanting new sensations and
bringing me out of me.

 
To comment on this poem, please log in or create a free account
Log in or register to comment