Can you come up with 170 different synonyms for shit?

I can!
They're all my haters who despise me for no other reason
than my success in breaking every Hello Poetry record (that is, the most followers, poems, words, likes, pageviews). The only other possible reason I can imagine is many of them are fucking anti-Semites. I'm not being paranoid. The member r, for example, in a piece I wrote about my mother being in Auschwitz, commented "if you can't stand the heat get out of the oven."
I've done nothing bad to these HP members whatsoever. All I've ever done is make supportive comments on their poetry ('good write', 'great write', 'lovely write', etc.).
I guess I'm also a constant reminder that they'll always be third-rate losers and never measure up to my God-given talent for writing. All I can say to all y'allz is 'go fuck yourselves you talentless turds.'

abby
Ashley Willson
Amanda-In-Scarlet
Annabel-Lee
anonymouswasawoman­
arse-­biscuit  
Atul-Drona-Kaushal
B.M.  
Bard-from the Bush
Becca-H
blivet  
body-waste
boneless-brown-trout
Bruised Orange  
BS  
bull­­-babbage  
bullshit  
butt-nugget  
caca  coiler  
Caitlin
calpu­r­nia mockingbird
chips
Christopher-Munro
Coop Lee
Corrina
Dawn-of-Lighten
cow-chip  
cow-pat  
cow-patty  
cow-­­pie  
crap  
crap-o-mundo  
crud  
DADS  
Dazzlebeam
deuce
diape­r­-gravy
dingleberry  
dirt  
Donie
doodie  
doo-doo  
do­ok­ie  
dooky  
dreck
droppings
droppings
dump
dung
egesta
enieff­ac
evacuation
excrement
excreta
fecal-matter
feces
FLF  
floater ­
F­rancie Lynch
fudge  
heim  
Helen
Helena-Andrea
Hilda
horse-s­hit
Ian Cairns ­
imadeitallup
Iminika Lith Law
indifference
Jack
Jeanne Midtowns
jenkem-jobbie  
j­ezebella
Joe Adomavicia
John Moffat
Jordan Harris
june samson
Kagami
kaka
Karl Chua
Kayla Briskey
Law Lith Iminika  
Lawrence
lincoln-log
loaf
log
love junkie ­
Lydia Nessma
manure
Maria
Marian
Marshall Gass
Mary-Elizabeth
merde
MF  
Miss Havisham
Morgane
mukk­­y  
Nat-Lipstadt
Next Stop
number-two  
ordure
Pamela Rae
Parvaneh
Patrick H
Paula Lee
Poetoft­­heway
poo  
poonami  
poop
poopie  
poo-poo  
Prudence Ahumareze
Pure LOVE
Pure SHIT
Purple Orchid
Pushing Daisies
r
Raghiba batool
Riq Schwartz
road-apple 
robert martin 
Roger Turner
Roisin Sheridan Bry­­son
Sally A Bayan
Samantha Mary W  
scheisse
sewer-trout
Shaded Lamp
shintos
shit  
shitake  
S­hivam-Porwal
shiz  
shiznak  
shiznip  
shiznot  
shnickerdoodl­es­  
sigh-no-more
Sjr1000
skid-mark
Spencer Dennison  
steamer
Stevie Ray de Vries Andries  
Still-Crazy
stin­k-p­ickle  
stool  
sugar-honey-ice-tea  
Sye
Тадеус
Tah-Miroze
T­he-B­ard-From-The-Bush
Third-Mate-Third
Timothy
turd
turtle-head ­
V
Vicki
V­ictoria
Violet
waste-matter
Weasel
WickedHope
W L Winter
wolf-bait
Zoe
凸( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)凸


Feces
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feces

Hatred
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hatred
.

When life deals you shit,
make the most of it.
Life's arcade won't always give you
the option of lemonade.

#life   #10w   #shit   #choice   #option   #couplet   #lemonade   #turd   #beryldov   #unturned  
Now I'm being haunted by a turd shaped ghost!
RH 78
RH 78
May 19, 2015

The saddest day of my life.
My mud baked excrement died at sea. Bobbing up and down with the style of a cheap hooker, I wiped a tear from my eye as I said goodbye.
A part of me felt choked as white streams of bog role acted as the white sheet of a murder scene.
No police, no forensics.
Strangulation appeared to be the cause resulting in decapitation.
Wouldn't have happened if I didn't use Manipulation to overcome the chronic constipation.
Last time I eat beans on toast.
Now I'm being haunted by a turd shaped ghost!

#loss   #shit   #turd  
Who couldn't pass a turd.
Edna Sweetlove
Edna Sweetlove
Sep 23, 2015

Whilst walking down the street
I heard a thunderous tweet;
'Twas a straining little bird
Who couldn't pass a turd.

The little thing was constipated,
Its anus wide dilated;
Tweeting loudly in mid-bog,
Trying to eject a log.

I observed with sympathetic heart
As it trumpeted out a fart;
Straining, chirping loud and long,
Letting off a foul and noisome pong.

I watched for nigh an hour
Its display of anal power;
Then a final intestinal pump
Produced a huge great steaming lump:

A mighty ball of faeces
(a giant of its species,
and total bumhole splitter
which shattered its feathered shitter).

#explicit   #turd   #farts   #avian  
Love is an unflushed-down turd
Gabriel K
Gabriel K
Sep 14, 2015

Love is an unflushed-down turd
that floats
guiltily

© Gabriel Kemlo
#love   #turd  
A bird turd's on third;
βέƦẙḽ Dṏṽ the Smartass Rabbi

A bird turd's on third;
now guess who's on first?

Who's on First?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who%27s_on_First%3F
.
#first   #10w   #guess   #baseball   #bird   #turd   #beryldov   #third   #burlesque   #bases  
me turd dick is soo big
truckerwithapassionforreggae

me turd dick is soo big
me rasta dick
me love chick peas

rasta blasta
#reggae  
Turd
Allen Wilbert
Allen Wilbert
Oct 16, 2013

Turd

Went to the toilet and saw a floating turd,
not flushing is so damn absurd.
Pushed the handle and found out why,
what happened next made me cry.
Brown water coming to the top,
tried everything but it wouldn't stop.
Water and turds all over the floor,
this is something, I didn't ask for.
Squeezed my nose and grabbed a plunger,
it's a good thing I used to be a plumber.
I can feel the turds oozing through my toes,
man this shit really blows.
Finally I got the water to go down,
the once white tile is now covered brown.
Smells so bad, I started to gag,
got some paper towels, a mop and a bag.
Sprayed Fabreze as much as I could,
puked on the floor where I stood.
Took an hour, but the bathroom is clean,
never have I seen something so obscene.
Jumped myself in the shower,
gave myself one hell of a scour.
Suddenly up from the drain,
another turd, I couldn't detain.
There it was laughing at me,
this shit is fucked up, wouldn't you agree.
Maybe this is the famous Mr. Hankey,
this South Park character is making me cranky.
Everywhere I looked, all day I saw poop,
it was like a nightmarish continuous loop.
Just couldn't get turds off my mind,
for the first time in my life, I wish to be blind.
For now on my bathroom is the back yard,
who would have thought turds would leave me scarred.

me turd leg cost me 1900.00 annually in
truckerwithapassionforreggae

takin the load down the dirt road,
thinkin about the reggae girl me once loved,
boy did i like the way she rubbed,
i notice me rasta themed pants had a little bump,
me third leg was feelin a little stiff,
i decided to light me a little splif,
me started to rub thee bumb in me pant,
no way i was bout to stop, no way, no chance,
i feel a sensation, me son is Croatian,
me lost control of me rig and next ting ya kno,
me in the ditch wit at sticky hand,
me turd leg cost me 1900.00 annually in
insurance. me learned dat me dont
have much indurance. da lesson to be
learned is if your feeling an itch on ya
turd leg, pullover because if ya dont
you be broke as a reggae boy lost at sea

Even your favorite author sits down to take a shit.

Author
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Author
.
#10w   #shit   #author   #turd   #beryldov   #pooh   #wikipedia   #lincoln-logs   #doody-calls   #caca  
 
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