I collect happenings of each passing day
and stored them into separate sections of my archive
Sometimes, I attempted to take a file out from a particular section
I would often be greeted by a void or a message that says
"Your search did not match any documents"
Then it occurred to me that it no longer exists.
Cease beating the roof.
Cease falling off the leaves, or the tree barks.
Cease kissing the pavement
or the people's skin.
for hope sits on the first row to disappointment.
Now I call You hither come.
And where be You? Refrained from aiding
my belief that does cease. Now become
I one without such. Turn I
away towards the depths of bitter surcease.
Cease my belief! Oh bitter One,
Life has come and been undone!
Heart beat, beat again.
Don't leave me alone my only friend
Don't leave me here to die in vain.
Don't leave me please just say my name
Just clasp my hand keep me awake
If I sleep I'll slip from your embrace.
So shake me hard, I'm leaving soon,
Keep me from slumber and here with you.
My blood runs cold it won't be long,
Please sing to me an angel's song,
True beauty's voice inside my ear
To fill my sails away from here.
This ship I'll take to rest in peace.
Sweet voice, sweet girl, sweet night.
When you leave, go without a whisper,
as though you were never here.
Do not leave tear stains on my pillow or kiss my eyes and beg them not to cry.
Dissipate, let the thin air replace you. Leave no echo, no trace of your existence,
no backward pity glance at what might have been,
Fuck the drawn out goodbye, the heartfelt speech, the apologies for the inevitable.
It's not you it's me.....It's always me.
Let the truth hang above my broken form, swaying as the ceiling creaks under its bitter weight. I will dance to it's rhythm soon enough.
I miss that which has long ceased to be
I'm sure you're still beautiful
I know you are
But you're not who I fell in love with
Time has done so much
Changed, gnarled, skewed
I wander through graveyards of dead memories
Fondly reminiscing warm hands, soft lips, radiant sunsets, cruise ships
We amass stories, experiences
We adapt and change
What is left of the person you were 3 years ago? 5? 10?
And so again I'm sorry
(I've learned the taste of that word well)
I've no idea who you are today
But I love you, whatever that means
However I can, I love you