What vanity is to one man is marketing to another.

I can't help my self-promotion. I studied marketing at Columbia University and did my grad studies at the New York School of Hard Knocks. I am cursed with a competitive edge. I believe I have a unique voice that deserves the attention it gets ~ like 11.4 million pageviews on HP.
To all my haters, please permit me to quote my buddy Cartman:
Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah! Take your bitching about my 'vanity', fold it five ways and put it where the moon don't shine, bitches.

Thank y'all for reading me. I promise to keep giving you a good reason.
As as reward I will share with you my absolute favorite marketing joke ever (I don'r know who wrote it, but I want to buy him a dozen Krispy Kremes for coming up with it):

Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Rome. One has a cross in front of him. The other one the Star of David. Many people go by and look at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest comes by, stops and watches throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none give to the beggar behind the Star of David.

Finally, the priest goes over to the beggar behind the Star of David and says: "My poor fellow, don't you understand? This is a Catholic country. People aren't going to give you money if you sit there with a 'Star of David' in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably give to him just out of spite."

The beggar behind the 'Star of David' listened to the priest, turned to the other beggar with the cross and said: "Moishe, look who's trying to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing."
.
.

I write with the power of a hurricane;
my words fall as prolific as rain.
I am a force of nature.

I am a poet.

#go   #poet   #life   #fire   #nature   #mother   #strength   #endurance   #power   #wordsmith   #for   #spirit   #genius   #activity   #force   #writer   #author   #ardor   #artist   #great   #turn   #gift   #critic   #might   #drive   #scribe   #punch   #journalist   #reporter   #trending   #zest   #quality   #spontaneity   #steam   #muscle   #verve   #juice   #intensity   #application   #zip   #lew   #liveliness   #beryldov   #animation   #zeal   #odist   #attribute   #moxie   #flair   #initiative   #enterprise   #faculty   #gaia   #lyricist   #lyrist   #balladeer   #bard   #minstrel   #biographer   #columnist   #contributor   #correspondent   #dramatist   #editor   #essayist   #freelancer   #ghostwriter   #novelist   #screenwriter   #scribbler   #scripter   #stenographer   #stringer   #rhapsodist   #strolling   #versifier   #vitality   #maker   #vehemence   #aptitude   #capacity   #stamina   #pluck   #vim   #vivacity   #lan   #mother-nature   #dash   #efficiency   #capability   #exertion   #fortitude   #poetaster   #terra   #pizzazz   #qualification   #person-of-letters   #dilettante   #librettist   #parodist   #rhymer   #balladist   #metrist   #rimer   #sonnetist   #get-up-and-go   #zing   #tuck   #earth-mother   #gaea   #ge   #magna-mater   #mother-goddess   #tellus   #birr   #effectiveness   #efficacy   #forcefulness   #hardihood   #operativeness   #pep   #potency   #puissance   #toughness   #virility   #habilitation  
*she kisses with pizzazz, filling me with blazing fire.*
K Balachandran
K Balachandran
Sep 8, 2012

My reclusive muse,  realized her fault,
seeing me unkempt and miserable, remorsefully, she melts:
" kept you desolate, my love, it hurts my heart,
you have been sincere, it's my fault"
she kisses with pizzazz, filling me with blazing fire.

with pizzazz
CoRiNnE
CoRiNnE
Jul 19

eyes watching
but nobody stares
double takes
as you walk by

this body is flawless...

not really,
but that's the way
you gotta feel

I remain poised
hips tilted
angle of the axis
smile slight
but revealing
eyes dazzle
with pizzazz
untainted by
your sense of direction
catch the eyes
and send shivers
down your spine

© CD
her pizzazz on the stage cannot be beat
Elizabeth Squires
Elizabeth Squires
Oct 29, 2013

her pizzazz on the stage cannot be beat
she was the sassy dame of Big Spender
in a glittering gown she looks so neat

dynamic moves she would oft tender  
verve goes into her one woman show
she was the sassy dame of Big Spender

with mic on stand she really glows
Bond Movie themes made her a star
verve goes into her one woman show

other cabaret act aren't of her par
Diamonds Are Forever so well known
Bond Movie themes made her a star

a Welsh lass with fab sounding tones
around the world her tunes are often spun
Diamonds Are Forever so well known

her fans think she is number one
around the world her tunes are often spun
her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
in a glittering gown she looks so neat

her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
Elizabeth Squires
Elizabeth Squires
Apr 28, 2013

her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
she is the dame of the song Big Spender
in a glittering gown she looked neat

dynamic moves she'd often tender
verve goes into her one woman show
she is the dame of the song Big Spender

with mic on stand she really glows
Bond Movie themes made her a star
verve goes into her one woman show

other cabaret acts are not of her par
Diamonds Are Forever so well known
Bond Movie themes made her a star

a Welsh girl with fab sounding tones
on record players her tunes are spun
Diamonds Are Forever so well known

her fans think she is number one
on record players her tunes are spun
her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
in a glittering gown she looked neat

who wore Ginsberg’s skirt with less  pizzazz
Ugochukwu-Charles Onyewuchi
Ugochukwu-Charles Onyewuchi
Jun 28, 2013      July 01, 2013

In the burning right hand of the bald city,
denizens frame calories and count instagram blessings
while beacons of hope refund inspiration in USADA pee cups.

Abyssinian maids wail over yesterday lovers
who wore Ginsberg’s skirt with less  pizzazz
and watched bedbugs suck blood off knee caps
wondering, what if Jesus Christ drove a Nissan?

As bullets of paragraphs fall Vietnamese pesticides on my head,
The dusts off my breath sing homilies
With letters of broken leather whiskey,
For even in the most dishonest jest,
clandestine toothbrushes are overrated
and every first false lie is the only truth.

NOW ACCEPTING SUBMISSIONS cure13.org/
Flash and pizzazz the filling substitutes for longevity a
M H
M H
Apr 9

I am the generation of the now
One liners and snippets of motivational text
The rocket fuel to propel minds into the unknown
With direction serving as an irrelevant afterthought;
Charge full on into the unknown with passion and guns blazing
The formula of operations:
Speak loudly and carry a big stick
=
Scream over and bludgeon opposing views.
Flash and pizzazz the filling substitutes for longevity and wisdom
Trumpet yourself and everyone will take notice
--a catchy jingle and an outrageous stunt
What can be better than being a whore to advertising?
I want the world, I want it now
Better yet make it yesterday, last week, last year
Nothing will satisfy but everything with a little more on top.
Generation flash has the answers
Printed on neon t-shirts selling for twenty five bucks
Did you get yours yet?

worn-down pizzazz
Reece AJ Chambers
Reece AJ Chambers
Jul 23      Jul 24

Coming down with something
     blame summer
     point a finger at the city
worn-down pizzazz
     drunk trumpets
and I hide in my coat
    
trees look better without leaves
is it just me?
   see the sun bellow
   into buildings

student affairs
   like heat rash
bounce along hallways

foreign mumbo-jumbo
   mishpelt words

they say him met her
saw six pictures last night


I haven’t met me
   books know truth
not brunettes

good poetry
better than sex
   they’re running running running away with it
between spritzers
   and sandwiches
   now snooze until Halloween
   brown back in fashion

    caught in the middle
    piedra de aguacate
I handle guitars
    they fiddle with women

now  
   let apple juice trickle
from my lips
   and a man gets out a taxi
    drops his phone

Written: July 2014.
Explanation: A poem written in my own time, another dealing with the 'city', in contrast to my ongoing beach/sea series. Quite different from my normal style of work, and expect more in the future veering towards this style. NOT based on real events, although partially inspired by them. 'Piedra de aguacate' is Spanish for 'avocado stone.' Feedback appreciated as always.
With zest and pizzazz
Pieter Meyer

I try to find you
In a tune
Lost between the ebonies
And ivories
But you are stubborn
So I try to coax you out of your
Cocoon of comfort
With my magic flute
And tickling trumpet
But no existing sound
Gets you out
Of the hole you dug
So I go on a scouting trip
For a new sound which may do the trick
And in the depths of
The Amazon jungle
I find a call, so chilling
Yet thrilling
That I copy it and play it
With zest and pizzazz
Realising too late
It was the sound of a female
After killing its mate
As you rise from your slumber
I have just sealed my fate.

#sleep   #killing   #song   #fate   #mate   #willing   #chilling   #thrilling  
 
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