What vanity is to one man is marketing to another.

I can't help my self-promotion. I studied marketing at Columbia University and did my grad studies at the New York School of Hard Knocks. I am cursed with a competitive edge. I believe I have a unique voice that deserves the attention it gets ~ like 11.4 million pageviews on HP.
To all my haters, please permit me to quote my buddy Cartman:
Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah! Take your bitching about my 'vanity', fold it five ways and put it where the moon don't shine, bitches.

Thank y'all for reading me. I promise to keep giving you a good reason.
As as reward I will share with you my absolute favorite marketing joke ever (I don'r know who wrote it, but I want to buy him a dozen Krispy Kremes for coming up with it):

Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Rome. One has a cross in front of him. The other one the Star of David. Many people go by and look at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest comes by, stops and watches throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none give to the beggar behind the Star of David.

Finally, the priest goes over to the beggar behind the Star of David and says: "My poor fellow, don't you understand? This is a Catholic country. People aren't going to give you money if you sit there with a 'Star of David' in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably give to him just out of spite."

The beggar behind the 'Star of David' listened to the priest, turned to the other beggar with the cross and said: "Moishe, look who's trying to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing."
.
.

I write with the power of a hurricane;
my words fall as prolific as rain.
I am a force of nature.

I am a poet.

#go   #poet   #life   #fire   #nature   #mother   #strength   #endurance   #power   #wordsmith   #for   #spirit   #genius   #activity   #force   #writer   #author   #ardor   #artist   #great   #turn   #gift   #critic   #might   #drive   #scribe   #punch   #journalist   #reporter   #trending   #zest   #quality   #spontaneity   #steam   #muscle   #verve   #juice   #intensity   #application   #zip   #lew   #liveliness   #beryldov   #animation   #zeal   #odist   #attribute   #moxie   #flair   #initiative   #enterprise   #faculty   #gaia   #lyricist   #lyrist   #balladeer   #bard   #minstrel   #biographer   #columnist   #contributor   #correspondent   #dramatist   #editor   #essayist   #freelancer   #ghostwriter   #novelist   #screenwriter   #scribbler   #scripter   #stenographer   #stringer   #rhapsodist   #strolling   #versifier   #vitality   #maker   #vehemence   #aptitude   #capacity   #stamina   #pluck   #vim   #vivacity   #lan   #mother-nature   #dash   #efficiency   #capability   #exertion   #fortitude   #poetaster   #terra   #pizzazz   #qualification   #person-of-letters   #dilettante   #librettist   #parodist   #rhymer   #balladist   #metrist   #rimer   #sonnetist   #get-up-and-go   #zing   #tuck   #earth-mother   #gaea   #ge   #magna-mater   #mother-goddess   #tellus   #birr   #effectiveness   #efficacy   #forcefulness   #hardihood   #operativeness   #pep   #potency   #puissance   #toughness   #virility   #habilitation  
*she kisses with pizzazz, filling me with blazing fire.*
K Balachandran
K Balachandran
Sep 8, 2012

My reclusive muse,  realized her fault,
seeing me unkempt and miserable, remorsefully, she melts:
" kept you desolate, my love, it hurts my heart,
you have been sincere, it's my fault"
she kisses with pizzazz, filling me with blazing fire.

with pizzazz
CoRiNnE
CoRiNnE
3 days ago

eyes watching
but nobody stares
double takes
as you walk by

this body is flawless...

not really,
but that's the way
you gotta feel

I remain poised
hips tilted
angle of the axis
smile slight
but revealing
eyes dazzle
with pizzazz
untainted by
your sense of direction
catch the eyes
and send shivers
down your spine

© CD
her pizzazz on the stage cannot be beat
Elizabeth Squires
Elizabeth Squires
Oct 29, 2013

her pizzazz on the stage cannot be beat
she was the sassy dame of Big Spender
in a glittering gown she looks so neat

dynamic moves she would oft tender  
verve goes into her one woman show
she was the sassy dame of Big Spender

with mic on stand she really glows
Bond Movie themes made her a star
verve goes into her one woman show

other cabaret act aren't of her par
Diamonds Are Forever so well known
Bond Movie themes made her a star

a Welsh lass with fab sounding tones
around the world her tunes are often spun
Diamonds Are Forever so well known

her fans think she is number one
around the world her tunes are often spun
her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
in a glittering gown she looks so neat

her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
Elizabeth Squires
Elizabeth Squires
Apr 28, 2013

her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
she is the dame of the song Big Spender
in a glittering gown she looked neat

dynamic moves she'd often tender
verve goes into her one woman show
she is the dame of the song Big Spender

with mic on stand she really glows
Bond Movie themes made her a star
verve goes into her one woman show

other cabaret acts are not of her par
Diamonds Are Forever so well known
Bond Movie themes made her a star

a Welsh girl with fab sounding tones
on record players her tunes are spun
Diamonds Are Forever so well known

her fans think she is number one
on record players her tunes are spun
her pizzazz on stage cannot be beat
in a glittering gown she looked neat

who wore Ginsberg’s skirt with less  pizzazz
Ugochukwu-Charles Onyewuchi
Ugochukwu-Charles Onyewuchi
Jun 28, 2013      July 01, 2013

In the burning right hand of the bald city,
denizens frame calories and count instagram blessings
while beacons of hope refund inspiration in USADA pee cups.

Abyssinian maids wail over yesterday lovers
who wore Ginsberg’s skirt with less  pizzazz
and watched bedbugs suck blood off knee caps
wondering, what if Jesus Christ drove a Nissan?

As bullets of paragraphs fall Vietnamese pesticides on my head,
The dusts off my breath sing homilies
With letters of broken leather whiskey,
For even in the most dishonest jest,
clandestine toothbrushes are overrated
and every first false lie is the only truth.

NOW ACCEPTING SUBMISSIONS cure13.org/
Flash and pizzazz the filling substitutes for longevity a
M H
M H
Apr 9

I am the generation of the now
One liners and snippets of motivational text
The rocket fuel to propel minds into the unknown
With direction serving as an irrelevant afterthought;
Charge full on into the unknown with passion and guns blazing
The formula of operations:
Speak loudly and carry a big stick
=
Scream over and bludgeon opposing views.
Flash and pizzazz the filling substitutes for longevity and wisdom
Trumpet yourself and everyone will take notice
--a catchy jingle and an outrageous stunt
What can be better than being a whore to advertising?
I want the world, I want it now
Better yet make it yesterday, last week, last year
Nothing will satisfy but everything with a little more on top.
Generation flash has the answers
Printed on neon t-shirts selling for twenty five bucks
Did you get yours yet?

To your hypnotic pizzazz i give up,
pragya santani
pragya santani
Dec 19, 2013      Dec 19, 2013

His overwhelming moves,
Take me by surprise,
All my pains it removes,
His feelings he belies,
It's you i admire,
You're charismatic look,
It sets my heart afire,
The charm you hold i can't overlook,
The way you smile when you touch me,
That euphoric passion, still in search of,
I just let the feelings pass through my veins, carefree,
I gave you all of me, you're requests i can't rebuff,
To your hypnotic pizzazz i give up,
Enchanted by your sparkling eyes of sapphire,
The feelings of love and lust begin to erupt,
From this relation i can't quagmire,
The need in you in as strong as mine,
Third degree burns when you touch my body,
The passion is thick as we entwine,
Even in this thick weather foggy,
The way you crave is plain to see,
Still in search of that ecstasy,
This eccentric love i can't set free,
You're more than just a fantasy,
Hot love and its compassion and clemency,
Third eye visions that are beautiful and true,
You're attitude i eulogise,
The real view of life just for you,
My excitement you arise,
This elation is hard to define,
All I can say is I'll cling to you forever, you'll be mine.

A little pizzazz, a lot of Wow
Mike Hauser
Mike Hauser
Jul 4, 2013      Jul 5, 2013

First come up with a catchy title
One that will draw the crowds
Throw in a bit of Mojo
A little pizzazz, a lot of Wow

Give it a twinge of what people want
A slight tweak of what people need
That can stand on it's on, slap them square in the face
How about you call it FREE MONEY!

Now that you have the hardest of parts
Tightly locked in place
It's time to spin the ultimate rhyme
One that will blow them all away

Throw in a little love for all the ladies
One or two car chases for Dad
So as not to leave anyone out
Dinosaur's and bunny rabbits for the kids

Now take it and mix it together
Slightly shaken but never stirred
Till you have them eating out of your hands
Devouring your every word

This will keep them coming back for more
They will always be waiting in line
For your next junket through
The world of mysterious rhyme

I hope that this has been helpful
And in a way has enlightened you
Now go out there Mr.and Miz Poet
There's a line outside waiting for you

 
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