Your eyes are always so crinkled
School must drain you so
Always barely perceiving
They were disheartening with
melancholy in tow
I'll never forget the night I realized
No longer creased, no longer apathetic
So round, so alive
In this moment I realized that I
had seen them before
I saw a glimpse today
Maybe it's too much to think that
I made your eyes everything
Everything I needed to be alrite
I kissed your mouth that night
A person like you could be good for me
i want you to scream “SHUT UP!” in the middle of one of my ramblings
no, no one.
i want you to do it and i want you to slap me and then i want you to kiss me
and i want to be FURIOUS with you
but i want to taste your lips
i’m so far gone and i’m so long lost
and i feel like a million dust particles flying in the drapes of your mothers house
the one that wears the bright pink lipstick you hated as a child
it’s what i’ve always wanted, isn’t it?
and surround you in the most literal sense
because that’s the only sense i’m capable of fulfilling.
i am not overwhelming nor am i beautiful.
nor is my voice or my pale, pale skin.
even when it’s torn or taunt
or bitten or blackened
from your anger kisses
and your frustration vacuum
sucking up all of me
all of me
goodbye all of me
You tell me to close the curtains.
"Close the curtains so the neighbors won't see!"
But one thought rings out clear in my mind --
The curtains won't change what you're doing to me.
Even if the world's in the dark
About what happens under the cover of night,
It still hurts, it still happens, and it is real.
The situation is desperate for light.
You can try to belittle me -- go right ahead.
But I know something you don't know.
Hit me, hurt me, try to knock me down;
I have nowhere left to go.
I've already hit rock bottom;
I've got nowhere left to fall.
So, close the door behind you --
Because I'm going to tell it all.
my friend asked me what i'm going to do in LA when i get to california. i told her how i am going to wander around aimlessly until i die. she hung the phone up on me. i didn't have the guts to tell her how i plan on doing nothing at all. i plan to sleep outside. i plan to get strung out. i plan to be in a place where i will never have to look at the same face twice in the same day ever again unless i want to. and i don't want to.