Hershey, black satin, as long as my torso
Diamond green comforting eyes
Velveteen curious nose
Tongue like a pumice stone
Her elegant but waddling stride
Powerful, confident and territorial
Sitting like a queen on her throne
Cat of mine, mother to be
Tuxedo, black and white, bow tie and all
White sock covered feet like satin gloves
Long white elderly whiskers
He reminds me of Fred Astaire
Quick calculated light on his feet
Shy yet debonair
Patient, watchful and full of pride
Father to be
Oreo, friend and foe
White as snow, black face and tail
Large circular patches of black
Fearless fence and roof climber
Youngster full of mischievousness
Paws in the air, tummy exposed to the sun
Purring so loud she vibrates
Kitty of mine
You were a shadow to me,
You would follow me without question
Around every corner and on the fold of a bedsheet.
You would leave the house
Explore a tree
But you always left a trail of pinecones
To find your way back home.
The graceful thud of your paws
On my sleeping body,
Black fur darned with white socks
And I loved you,
I always loved you.
Life had dealt us a silent friendship,
Language was our deficiency
But we made it our own
Speaking through pupils
And reading the curve of our bodies.
And you were small,
You were always so small.
The runt of the litter
But you had the personality
To kill all the demons
That had scattered in my head through the day
And lull me back to sleep.
This knot in my stomach,
And the tears I concede
Are all for you and I don’t want to stop.
I will atone for every summer as a child
Lost in a dizzy haze of fun,
As you sat in the window
And waited for me.
Now it is my turn.
I saw you break into a shadow of yourself,
Even smaller every day
As you faded away by degrees.
I saw you fall limp into a dreamless sleep
And now as you are buried beneath the snow
I hope the first thing you see is me sat at the window.
I saw my grandfather today,
He's been dead seven years.
His smell still lingers,
On his old jacket
that hangs in my mother's closet.
Sometimes, I take it
and breathe him in.
His voice, coarse in his
last few fighting days,
used to ring deeply.
I hear him sometimes,
whispers from the air.
I saw my grandfather today.
He was driving,
The same green Nissan
The one my mother now owns.
He had his favorite blue cap on
It hangs in my room,
one in a sea of many
that adorn my
dead-limbed coat hanger.
I saw him,
Same wide starry-eyed grin.
He used to smile like that
when he was racking
up a game of eight-ball
mischievous twinkle in his eye.
that knew the game
And never lost.
He was there,
same "old spice and everything nice"
It reminds me of the summers
days winding into hours
I spent them all in the
cool, fan-whipped air
of his game room.
Maybe you know
your own sorrow
when a loved one goes.
Maybe. You know
how memories feel
now that we are hollow
I burned my tongue
while looking out the window
I couldn't help but find irony
in the juxtaposition of hot
and terrible cold
I see a familiar gray figure
that feeling where it feels like
your stomach is splitting in two
in the good way
but it's just my mind playing tricks on me
I wish so strongly
to find you out there in stormy weather
so I could take you inside
dry you off
and hold you until
the shivering subsides
Torture me in tortuga
bruises and bumps and contusions
twist up my arms and burn em off
twist them up go head burn em
take me to the chamber
lock me up ill never blame ya
turn me in to the law it is not your fault
turn me in its not cho fault
torch down my cacti
i will and stab your cats eye
rip off your necks lucky monkey paw
i will rip off your monkeys paw
twist em up and burn em
turn me in its not your fault
but if you do
just know through what i will go and do
rip off your monkeys paw
yo monkeys paw
yo monkeys paaaaaaw
...and as the army ants hunt on bellicose tusks
Now these paws of paper flies
Grope at a sperm like residue
Blazing out like neon coffins
Pertinent with an idle blood
And as I sit here with smoke
Stealing off from my fingertips
I know that to cut these hands off
And throw them away would be
A more conducive use of my time
And to refute this postulation
Is to cling like moss to branch
As the peacocks whirl about the blaze
I was aware in the strangest way,
For paws, bright eyes,
But no words to say,
Knowledge replaced by instinct,
Tame replaced by wild,
I was a beast,
No longer a child,
But I wasn't afraid,
Just so confused,
If this was dreams joke,
It must be amused,
But this felt so real,
And so natural,
The need to run with my freedom,
Clinched in my bones,
I wanted to feel my feet,
Hit the grass and the stones,
I wanted to thrust my head back,
And let out a roar,
This was freedom,
I could not ignore,
In lapse, we bought gifts
in threes for what is two now,
on the first Christmas
without you around.
And in lapse, I see you
in those shadowy doorways,
and it scorches now,
without you around.
Oh, your silent will
gave forth to what is true now,
over the ground
on which you have run.
Oh, my patient friend,
I'm still sitting at our window,
on this first Christmas
without you around.
a mind is cold and lying in a shallow pool
of tears some eyes have yet to shed
and a sky reflects too many memories
that leaves a heart's beat frozen in time
a body shivers as its joints achingly creak
as it crawls from a shadowy grave
a stone above dedicated to one's beloved
that lost their way in the ticking of a clock
a picture frame cracks and a ring is dropped
to a hard wood floor covered with prints
when a faint knock is heard at a door
at an hour where no visitor should wake
a lover is behind this tightly locked door
crying silently in melancholy and pain
if only this body could be a ghost
to watch over its love for every day
a fear is creeping into some kindled blood
yet a faint hope keeps some hands open
as if to pull someone in close embrace
that would keep a tight hold for eternity
a quiet is heard from beyond a barrier
that unless invited one cannot pass
so back into the shadows a lover goes
unforgotten by death's creeping watch
a silence is heard from beyond a door
as some tears thaw and begin to stream
and memories are tucked safely into a heart
of a love to never be forgotten by time