What a secretive jerk!
Shari Forman
Shari Forman
Oct 29, 2013

He threw our relationship away,
To get back the life he used to have.
What a secretive jerk!

Kaedon
Kaedon
Nov 18, 2012

and i'd walk through hell just to prove a point
i date a girl for their heart and you try to avoid them,
why do you criticize when you don't even know
that your a poor little boy who harms their souls

GussE
GussE
Feb 16      Feb 17

I would stand by you if you had a better attitude.
I would love you if you were less shallow.
I would fight for you if you had a fight of your own.
I would listen to your problems
if I already didn’t hear them all.
What I wont do, is change for you.
I wouldn’t let you go without letting you know why.
And normally I wouldn’t ask you to change but I think you suck.

Just_being_mean
BoazUnk
BoazUnk
Jan 7

Sometimes when a person is talking to me
And what they're saying is particularly uninteresting
They might get the feeling that I'm not listening
And it's true
Because, mentally, I'm replacing the words they say with a repetition of the phrase:
Validate me!
Validate me!
Would you date me?
Masturbate me?
Won't you please?
Will you maybe?
And I stare back at them, stone-faced, while thinking:
No

Now Igonna teach ya how to jerk
ᏰέƦẙḽ Dṏሁ

Der are terrible judgments on dose
dat dare to come test I&I;!
My dreadlocks are my spiritual antennae
dat reach into da heavens
locking into YAH's
hundred-million megawatt signal.
YAH commanded me to take my Ible,
my Iphone, my Ipod, my Ipad
my Iwomen, my Ikids, my Iherb
and get da hell out of dat evil Babylon.
Sugar say,
"It's not the dread upon your head,
but the love inna your heart,
that mek ya Rastaman."
The love inna my heart
is the Zion within
and without the within how can
Ienter the New Yerusalem,
the Heavenly Zion without?
Igive tanks for life and the mighty life giver,
Holy Emmanuel I Selassie I Jah Rastafari.
Ipray for Peace, Love, Righteousness,
Joy, Clean Food, Clean Water,
Health, Rewarding Work,
Clothing, Shelter and Bounteous
Herb for all the peoples of da Earth.
                       Now Igonna teach ya how to jerk
dat not too shabby chicken.
First ting ya gotta do
is steal a chicken...

IRastaman's Recipe: IJerk dat Not Too Shabby Chicken
Serves 1 World
Separate checks please

1 onion
4 cloves of garlic
1 tbsp allspice
1 Scotch bonnet or red chilli
3 tbsp brown sugar
1 tbsp black pepper
1 tbsp red wine vinegar
4 sprigs of thyme
Juice of 2 limes
1 tbsp Maldon sea salt
1 free-range chicken, jointed

For da salad sides:
1 tin red kidney beans
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 ripe avocado
2 fennel bulbs
1 organic unwaxed lemon

To make the marinade, peel and quarter da onion and peel da garlic cloves. Place both in a blender or food processor with da allspice, chilli (deseeded if you want less heat), sugar, black pepper, vinegar, thyme leaves, lime juice and sea salt. Blitz to a paste.

Using gloves, rub da paste really well into da chicken pieces, covering dem thoroughly, den place in a container or sandwich bag and put in da fridge. Leave to marinate for at least 2 hours.

Preheat da oven to 180C/Gas Mark 4. Place da chicken pieces skin side down on a baking tray. Roast for 30 minutes, turning over halfway through. Set aside, covered in foil, while preparing da side dishes.

Preheat da grill. Drain da beans, season and drizzle with 1 tbsp of da oil. Scoop da flesh from da avocado, mash and season. Place da fennel bulbs in a food processor with da lemon. Season again and dress with da remaining oil.

Place da chicken skin side up under da hot grill. Cook until beginning to blacken and da skin is crisp. Serve with da salad sides.
IYummy!

Now Igive you some jokes to spice up da dinna conversation:

10 Things You Will Never Hear A Rastaman Say

1."No wifey, tek my car instead."

2."Waiter, this steak is overcooked."

3."She 'ave a nice body.... but 'ar bottom too big."

4."Wha'apen Mr.Deejay, you cyaah play some calypso?"

5."Di pill doan gree wid mi wife so ah gweh get a vasectomy."

6."No sweetie, ah cyaah tek anodda whites (rum), mi haffi drive all de way to Kingston and it dark and wet outside."

7."Some ah mi closest friend dem gay."

8."Size dont matter."

9."Yeah mi eat under 2 foot table."

10."Nuff Respect to Brian Lara."
#love   #world   #jerk   #rastaman   #rasta   #chicken   #marley   #jamaica  
   Now Igonna teach ya how to jerk
ᏰέƦẙḽ Dṏሁ

Der are terrible judgments on dose
dat dare to come test I&I;!
My dreadlocks are my spiritual antennae
dat reach into da heavens
locking into YAH's
hundred-million megawatt signal.
YAH commanded me to take my Ible,
my Iphone, my Ipod, my Ipad
my Iwomen, my Ikids, my Iherb
and get da hell out of dat evil Babylon.
Sugar say,
"It's not the dread upon your head,
but the love inna your heart,
that mek ya Rastaman."
The love inna my heart
is the Zion within
and without the within how can
Ienter the New Yerusalem,
the Heavenly Zion without?
Igive tanks for life and the mighty life giver,
Holy Emmanuel I Selassie I Jah Rastafari.
Ipray for Peace, Love, Righteousness,
Joy, Clean Food, Clean Water,
Health, Rewarding Work,
Clothing, Shelter and Bounteous
Herb for all the peoples of da Earth.
                       Now Igonna teach ya how to jerk
dat not too shabby chicken.
First ting ya gotta do
is steal a chicken...

IRastaman's Recipe: IJerk dat Not Too Shabby Chicken
Serves 1 World
Separate checks please

1 onion
4 cloves of garlic
1 tbsp allspice
1 Scotch bonnet or red chilli
3 tbsp brown sugar
1 tbsp black pepper
1 tbsp red wine vinegar
4 sprigs of thyme
Juice of 2 limes
1 tbsp Maldon sea salt
1 free-range chicken, jointed

For da salad sides:
1 tin red kidney beans
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 ripe avocado
2 fennel bulbs
1 organic unwaxed lemon

To make the marinade, peel and quarter da onion and peel da garlic cloves. Place both in a blender or food processor with da allspice, chilli (deseeded if you want less heat), sugar, black pepper, vinegar, thyme leaves, lime juice and sea salt. Blitz to a paste.

Using gloves, rub da paste really well into da chicken pieces, covering dem thoroughly, den place in a container or sandwich bag and put in da fridge. Leave to marinate for at least 2 hours.

Preheat da oven to 180C/Gas Mark 4. Place da chicken pieces skin side down on a baking tray. Roast for 30 minutes, turning over halfway through. Set aside, covered in foil, while preparing da side dishes.

Preheat da grill. Drain da beans, season and drizzle with 1 tbsp of da oil. Scoop da flesh from da avocado, mash and season. Place da fennel bulbs in a food processor with da lemon. Season again and dress with da remaining oil.

Place da chicken skin side up under da hot grill. Cook until beginning to blacken and da skin is crisp. Serve with da salad sides.
IYummy!

Now Igive you some jokes to spice up da dinna conversation:

10 Things You Will Never Hear A Rastaman Say

1."No wifey, tek my car instead."

2."Waiter, this steak is overcooked."

3."She 'ave a nice body.... but 'ar bottom too big."

4."Wha'apen Mr.Deejay, you cyaah play some calypso?"

5."Di pill doan gree wid mi wife so ah gweh get a vasectomy."

6."No sweetie, ah cyaah tek anodda whites (rum), mi haffi drive all de way to Kingston and it dark and wet outside."

7."Some ah mi closest friend dem gay."

8."Size dont matter."

9."Yeah mi eat under 2 foot table."

10."Nuff Respect to Brian Lara."
#love   #world   #jerk   #rastaman   #rasta   #chicken   #marley   #jamaica  
it okay to put up with someone being a jerk to you
Sweetheart

Is it okay to put up with someone being a jerk to you
If you know they are broken?

Lorenzo Dobson
Lorenzo Dobson
Sep 29, 2012

She invited me into her home
I entered
I didn't wipe my feet
I didn't bother to take my shoes off
I left footprints all over her floor
I raided her refrigerator and her snack cabinet
I sat on her couch
I laid in her bed
I showered
I used her towel to wipe me clean
I put my clothes on
I left without saying thank you

Lately, as I settle down
on my elevated bed,
ready to sleep
and wake up revived,

t houghts of you
h ave soaked my mind
l ike a flannel
u nder the hot water tap.

T  his is unorthodox,
n  ormally it's her
w  ho stalks my visions
s  o why you,

w   hy now?
I   s this one of those things
t   hat's supposed to tell me
'   Look 'ere mate,

i    t's a sign you're movin' on?'
B    ut to this person?
G    ive over.
A    bit odd in my opinion,

b     ut she's not like the others,
t     hey're all shacked up
f     or the rest of their lives.
P     art of me shrieks no,

s      he can never know
a      nd the other part whispers
j      ust go ahead,
s      ee where it takes you.

Eyes open.
Oh, I was dreaming.
Jerked awake.
Choice to make.

Written: June 2012.
Explanation: Not my best - a poem written in my own time. The title refers not only to the jerk that people can experience as they fall asleep, but also to the way the text 'jerks' further right as the poem goes on.
Shaine Frazier
Shaine Frazier
Oct 8, 2013      Oct 9, 2013

Tell another excuse
and another excuse
and another excuse
tell her she got you confused; tear her heart to pieces
at least thats the best you could do since it's not literal don't take it so literal litter on her liver, you recycling your old lies lead her from reality and family
her old life
lead her to commitment to addiction or the matrix a false sense of presence and connection in your own life
never gave her a chance
never holding her hand
she always made the advance.
Baby not in public.
She said I'm tired of texting first I'm never on your mind as far as I'm concerned I'm in a hearse you never gave me life
but I bought her these jewels
but I bought her those shoes
but I love when she nude baby he love when you're nude
you know she don't deserve this you always take her gold
forehead kiss
eases pain as she remain your victim

© 2013 by S Fraz All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of S Fraz
 
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