When I was little, I refused to get out of the bathtub until the water cooled down completely and my skin resembled my grandmother's.
Now that I'm older, I take showers that seem to last forever.
I feel like the water is washing away all of the bad, all of what's wrong with me.
I'll go outside in the summer just to stand completely still in the torrents of rain, waiting for something to happen.
After all, I learned in school that water is the strongest force on Earth.
That water can conquer anything.
Water shaped the mountains.
Water shaped my bones.
Water will change my fate.
There are two things that comfort
Let’s see if you figure it out
They consume me, lock me in
They are both the darkness and the light
It makes me come alive and is safe
It traps me, drowns me
I’m not scared
It’s full of ecstasy, gasping for air
It can fill up any space
There is some panic
Feel the rain, feel the beat
The screams, sounds
The clean, the cold
I’m not sure why it fills me
I’m drowning in it all
I just take the leap
Let it happen
It’s freeing, gets rid of all the pain
The kind that no one can see
Washes out the night
All that remains is melody
Somewhere in the distance
I see you standing there
I wish I were laughing too
Your smile takes my breath
Away I’ll go
And inside I’m screaming
But you won’t hear it
Under the lakes and rivers
Are the silent sounds
The aches are drowned out
The rest is perfect noise
You can’t see the tears I’ve cried
Or hear the screams I hide
But just you wait
Til I breathe
To sing out the words
That I always need to say
The ones I keep hidden
You’ll hear them, someday
When the storm is gone
And the air is clear
All I needed
Was for you
Burning and popping still Lingers in my minds eye, I look down to see a crinkle in time. I walk through seeing flashes if gleaming memories. Smoky gray glass silently floating, wondering, but forever still. Blue twisting and spinning through all thoughts, like everlasting bruises of the sea. Gut retching anticipation of silent questions always answered, paused and stilled. Never again to be caressed by the silent husky laughter of memories past. Light begins to reappear through the memories of black and white photographs. Loneliness suffocates me as if all those years ago with water filling my veins.
I had been so lost, so alone. I was drowning in it. The effort it took to smile like I cared was so minimal. I scared myself with how much I didn't care. Voices running ramped through my mind. I was falling farther and farther into oblivion. Two hands reached out to scoop up the remains of me.
Silent and still I say there till I crumpled as if to be thrown away. Birthday wishes never come true if no one if whooshing for you. Tears held in, hair pulled on with dead inside hands like a toddler in the night. Until a shy smile came into sight. Timid and warm but is there more?
Time pasted, wounds began to heal. Words became fewer till non were spoken at all. Pain searing. Water calling. The sinking feeling was all I was missing. Sights and sound faded till all was blank. Pain all I felt, love betrayed. Torn and beaten till nothing remains. No smiles, no silent laughter, no words to ever to be spoken.
The water beckons.
The feeling of water flowing around me, never stopping. Hands that once has held me up now push me under. Circulating, pushing out pain. Searing life on the brink is all that's left. Black oblivion rushes in like the mistress of the sea's tide. Warm salty water flows as if from a broken facet. Till it all stopped.
of water under the bridge,
of currents, of stars, of gales, of the way the earth moves
of movement. restless movement, and cycles, and change
and you tell me
"love is a whirlwind,
the tides that break upon the sand
and the burning of the sun"
of water in the well,
of ripples, of the hearth, of the breeze, of the seedlings in the soil
of stillness. of tranquil stillness, and a silent heartbeat, and a steady pulse,
and i have learnt
"infatuation is a whirlwind,
the tides that break upon the sand
and the burning of the sun,
and love makes you want to hold still,
Night is but a word for the darkness that roams with men and the lands.
The song of the winds sparkling with a woman's tears unshed.
His blanket drapes her in the pitch of night.
A cure basks within the lady's eye.
The tears, made salty by the churning sea.
Cry the river dry.
Bewail until all is nigh.
The night is coming.
The darkness foretold.
Beware the madness
with a daggers fine edge.
Night may be just a word.
But the wickedness is true within man's might.
The sun will rise to cleanse the lands.
Daylight breaks and the word changes.
The faith of the worshipers dancing amongst the shining vivid rays.
The danger has passed.
Be still her fleeting heart.
But be wary,
dear maiden of mine.
For the darkness of the night will soon befall again.
Watery dreams ripple thought to existence.
Musing mixed with memory, travelling the distance
Of this dance, this walk, this journey...footprints.
Within the water,
A snapshot of experience.
Then the other.
Hike to the horizon.
A journey left behind but a journey yet to come.
My saviour left His footprints on the water
As He walked in His kingdom.
A miracle not over, we will do greater works than He.
In Him I find identity.
The Supernatural, naturally,
Even the stars are
not infinite; they too, will
someday fade away.