What will it be today?"
" I'll have some garlic, pepper and coke. "
" will that be all?"
Log: Ship Orinas last:
I made a short stop on planet earth. I am back in route toward home. Of course it's not every day one gets to stop and have the best spices and drink in the galaxy.
I am filled with regret
You were strong. You were brave. You were reliable.
I long to go back if God would allow
But who can fight time’s unrelenting tide?
I am filled with longing.
They miss you. I know they I do. I know I do.
The lack of shade. The sun’s smothering embrace.
If only I’d thought, and not run away.
I am filled with remorse.
Will you forgive me?
I am filled with regret.
You were the best dog a family could have.
I had a dream that i kissed you.
In a dry field with no one else around.
We talked, and i snuck in.
I brushed your hair out of the way and
went in for the kill
I dont recall it being soft
just something ive done.
like a memory or
an after thought
and i wasnt ashamed
cause i knew it had to happen
you said nothing
and i let it be
I walked away slowly
i am so conflicted right now,
because i know i'm at fault too,
but when you go and say
all of this shit to me,
i can't help but wonder.
what did i do wrong?
i'm sure you could write
a long list of all my faults
and wrongs i've done,
just like i can write one
we were going to be friends,
you visited that one day,
and even though you cried,
my heart was numb and
no tears could come.
i've done my share of giving my
tears throughout my life
and i'm honestly done with it.
it's exhausting, being hurt and sad
all the time. it's hard to keep up
and i've grown tired of the
now you've been given the hand,
how does it feel? you say
you're cynical, bitter, tired,
well darling, i believe it.
going down that road, it must
seem dark. are you going alone?
you're going to need a hand to hold,
i can see the dark circles
under your eyes, the tint of red
at the corners of the whites,
have you been crying lately?
the trees are going to loom over you,
evil fingers outstretching to
squeeze the good out of you.
don't become another me,
like a zombie i hope i haven't bitten
take this moment in stride,
learn from it and i know you'll
be holding hands with a new
mamasloth, taking her out for
ice cream and walking along the river,
looking into her gorgeous eyes,
and breathing a deep sigh knowing
that you have moved on, and you're all
it's never actually all right.
even though he was verbally abusive,
i still miss my first boyfriend.
the way his hair fell into his eyes, above
his glasses, and his big headphones
he'd sometimes place over my ears,
so loud that it'd drown out his voice
and i felt like i swimming in a sea
the way his eyes were a deep blue,
and it reminded me of the ocean i
saw once, and the way he called me
killer, so endearing,
when i was too excited.
calm down, killer
his smile, his voice,
for the longest time i thought
he was my soul mate,
but it was just the wrong moment
i thought once, i could fix it.
before we even begun, sweet pea.
speaking for just a few weeks,
went to wichita to see you,
asked if he'd like to see me too
and instead i got
you make me sick,
i hope i never see you again,
i just wanted to
string you along
like you did
it goes full circle, each time,
throwing hearts away
just to see how much it'll hurt this
Let me taste your sweet drops on my tongue
Virgin or thick as you like
Sharp and pointed with bitter fermentation
Dancing through the night
Lick my lips with your bubbly spice
And fill my mouth with the laughter
That comes after solid advice
Memories and late night talks
Of anything within the bounds of space
Energize or sap me but
Your anesthesia don't replace
I love your sugar high so lay
The sugar thick tonight
Anything but alcohol
To keep me from the light
So barren, for me, was that June
after your death, when I still left plates
of food up high out of your reach.
When we made the decision my head began to riot:
All Dogs Go To Heaven on Disney channel. But the abyss
into which you fell has no baby bunnies under the porch
or couch pillows like mountains or bites of Shepherd’s pie.
I remember you relished in eating peas
off the floor, your wrinkled tongue a prune
pressed against the wood.
But your life was a cocked pistol,
a fraying string on a guitar.
When the snap finally came, I brooded
a bit. But still, I miss your wet kiss.