Agony of memories shackled in soul
Loss of control
Cult raised isolation bred within youth
Eureka of truth
Abandoned by love own motherhood start
Burden of heart
Maternal disease and death's lengthy fight
Daytime to night
Caring in vain is like tightening rope
Grasping for hope
Sweet child now mortal illness attacked
Mind being racked
No support acquaintance or true friend
Alone till end
Questioning Deity in trial with doubt
Childish I pout
Weakness in battle spirit slowly died
Strength not inside
Broken wondering why His small pawn
Can't carry on
If only there were words
to the unspoken verses
when silence is the only sound
More than only
the nearly paralyzing torn,
weary of searching endlessly
for what cannot be found
silence whispering poignantly
drowning out the midnight rain,
There is not sorrow
in search of the lost
unstrummed guitar chords
forever left unsung;
woe betides an unfinished,
abandoned heart's song
Only a heart lonely knows,
there is no cacophomous darkness
whispering of screaming silence
by night and by day:
"all things must steal away"
not to be thought of wanderings end
as a velvety-crimson rosebud
shamelessly withers brown
Swirling eddies stir
a black swan of loneliness
swimming within the flood
of raven river waters'
its pitch black flow
Muted pleas silent as pity
blowin' in the fleeting windsong,
speaking in beckoning salutations
singing in sweetly beseeching tongues
Like the hush of a pensive soul,
once touched by another, moved
like a bedrock marrowed mountain
left stifled, stranded and wondering,
feeling an awkward silence
when the leaves come falling down
There are no misbegotten promises
cast lightly in the moonlight’s restless spell;
there is no solacing stillness
when silence is the only sound...
"When Silence is the Only Sound"
This title turns out being a fitting ending....
words in the wind ― blown away ― 3/15/2017
Breathing in the hot drowsy wind
that then sits, stagnant, in the lungs
of the weary figure (mine own)
and exhaling long, the lazy summer air
as she waited (I sat for hours you know)
for the afternoon to decay
even though time itself seemed to be drugged
slumbering in the African heat.
Engines winding ever tighter whine with the overload
But I don't hear it
Because the demons are shouting in my ears
Urging me to go faster on my blistered feet
Towards what, I can't divine.
Red system warning lights flash in every panel
But the message in entangled in the glare
Of one too many sunrise after far too little rest.
My insides burn, turn and broil. I feel as if I could burst. I want to do everything. And yet nothing excites me. Im worn from a long day but try as I might sleep doesn't come. Worries of the world stir through my head. I ache, I hurt, I yearn to sleep yet she still doesnt come.
Hunger twists my stomach yet no food fits my mood or apatite. Colors are bright yet bring me no delight or interest. The night wears on and yet I am still not gone. Sleep is the cool water on a burn, the mute on a loud static. The pause, the peace. Sleep is the calm in a life of chaos. Why does she now evade me.
A yawn escapes my lips. Please come. End the pain and suffering of the day. Take it away so in the new day I can wake calm and prepared ( and a little grouchy). I've lost all ability to think and yet I still can't sleep. Another yawn, one step close to the rest, the goodbye to the colors and hello to the hollow darkness where thought carries its own weight and no longer weighs down my head.
Long before the winds carried our metal wings across oceans,
They took feathered dreams to safety.
The oceans cradled generations in warm tides to family reunions,
Off coasts we have yet to discover.
Now it watches as our shores push them away in favor of high rises that bring us no closer to God or the heavens we hope to belong within.
Before the world existed to serve the greedy,
It gave in abundance.
We have made it weary,
Bending like a tired willow against the pressure of our gasping breath.
Just have a little bit,
To get you through the night.
Just have a little bit,
To be able to see the light.
Your heart is weary,
And your head hurts,
But know in your soul,
That this isn't the worst.
Listen to the advice,
Try your best,
And know that,
Soon the universe will answer those prayers.
unmoved am i
not a breath
drawn nor exhaled
as the blistering sun
a merciless sky
like a snail.
I close my eyes
and feel the pulse
baked, a beating