I was at your funeral
before you had given me a reason
to cry

nobody thinks about you until youre gone
nobody realizes the hole you will leave in their life until youve left it
nobody misses you until they cant have you anymore
nobody apologizes until it doesnt matter anymore
and now you're gone
and its too late
and nobody stopped you.

Is it a conspiracy?
I feel this empathy,
Like a weight bearing down on me,
But I have no power to change.

It seems like we're hurtling at a wall,
No one seems to notice,
Makes me question what it's all for,
But there's nothing I can do.

Too many people,
Too much stuff,
So many things,
Yet never enough.

I can see blood scattered in the road,
I can see myself lying there
Whilst covered in red liquid;
Crowds are going crazy everywhere,
I can here their screams,
They talk so loud as they panicked hard;
Tears of bitterness sprout within me,
Why do people cares when it's too late?

‘I’ve something to tell you...
I kissed someone else.’
‘You kissed someone else?!
That can’t be true, who?’

‘How could you not notice me,
you had many chances to see...
I don’t know what I want,
but this is honesty.’

He storms away, slamming door
out into the night. Then -

‘I’m sorry, your actions are yours but
it’s my fault you’re there...
please, I’ll get help, be your friend
I’ll get better, I swear...’

‘I love you’ says he
‘Why, truthfully?’
‘You’re so beautiful...
I don’t want to fail..’
But beautiful is a trophy, a conquest
and marriage isn’t a contest.

Actually, I now see
The kissing of someone else
was me, breaking free.
I’d broken long ago
his promises felt hollow
I was clutching at saving me.

My joy, our family, our life
all millstones to him,
burden and strife.
The endless trying, ideas and hope,
Fell on deaf ears - I was just the wife.

Then I stuck around, tried,
grief searing inside.
Let him touch me (excruciatingly)
give flowers and hold me...
but it was gone with old tides.

And simple jealousy tipped him?
Got to be kidding me.

I spent a lot of time
Trying to fix you,
But I never realized
That you were breaking me.

While I was putting
Your pieces back together,
You were ripping mine apart.
But by the time
I realized it,

It was too late.

Everything is coming to an end.
          I whisper to my self
The tears show up, so unexpected.
          The world goes blurred

In the morning the sirens will be heard
           One more no more
Then deafening silence passes
            Is it a win or a defeat score

Put on a mask, blend in
              Who can tell now who is breathing
No warning, but there were signs
              It is little too late to listen now

How unexpected tables can turn
               it is a sequence of slow burns
Now sour limes turn sweet buns
                "How unexpected indeed"

A picture on the table,
               Not a person on the sidewalk
Found a place in the house now
               it is about time too late.