(song)

Dark is older then light so that might be why fright is what I'm accustome to
Neither vast nor confined, maybe both at the same time, it leaves no clue
I don't know how to get my point across to you to help you to see what it is I go through
It's a nothing that consumes my everything, there's not a thing you can compare it to
Similes only vaguely paint the picture but it helps to toss in a few
If there was only a wind that blew, even once, maybe it would bring a familiar view
But this void in its vastness brings nothing new, allows nothing to continue
It's the solvent to my glue, everything I've done it's managed to uproot and undo
And it's so quiet but yet this silent surrounding is deafening to an alarming degree
In it I use to find beauty, now it's my captor, one of which I'll never be set free
And it's convinced me, or maybe I've convinced myself that I am unworthy
Of anything else and its that false certenty that cleverly keeps me in captivity
I carelessly embraced this darkness that slowly replaced the old me entirely
I scream, cry then whimper softly as the misery slowly embodies me
Then lay back in submittance, in silence and plea for swift mercy
I can't stay in this purgatory so give me my life back or take it from me completely

I feel numb, I feel numb, I feel nothing, there's just nothing, nothing, nothing...
I feel numb, I'm so numb, I feel nothing, there's just nothing here for me

I had light once, I actually got to hold it
But it was a betrayal, only staying for a moment
In its wake the dark returned to claim what was stolen from it
The door was to heavy, I couldn't shut it
The nothing engulfed my everything, I couldn't out run it
Panic set like quick cement, begin to sweat, my feet became heavy, I began to resent and regret
All those scary movies I watched cause I knew for sure that this was it
But that's just it
Nothing happened, I literally mean nothing was the constant
No up, no down, no light, no sound, I couldn't even pick up a sent
Then in an instant it hit me like a brick and I knew what it all ment
Light, so faint and vulnerable, so young and nieve
It didn't stand a chance against the dark, give a **** what you believe
Just because you achieve a small glimpse of hope don't think you'll never grieve
When your life starts to unwieve that's when the dark races in like a thief
Every religion and belief labels it differently depending on the way they perceive
They have to cause a mind can't conceive it so it almost has to make it make believe
But please believe this is real, don't mis conceive
Best heed my warning cause once you're here you can never leave

I feel numb, I feel numb, I feel nothing, there's just nothing, nothing, nothing...
I feel numb, I'm so numb, I feel nothing, there's just nothing here for me

©2022

If you love me, do not pick me
As though I am a flower that has just bloomed
So you can marvel at my natural beauty
In the comfort of your small room

Where I sit in a pretty vase on the table
Or underneath glass bounded by a frame
You only show what you want to see of me
As if I am wild flower that you have tamed

You do not acknowledge my leaves
Tightly contained here with nowhere to go
They are hidden in this pretty vase
Questioning the purpose of its own growth

You only see me for my vibrant colour
Will you keep me until you see fit?
When I start to look far from my peak
Will you discard me for another miss?

When I lose the petals that you loved so dearly
And my stem limps against the pretty vase
Would you still care to love me
When you think I've lost all of my grace?

I was beautiful before you loved me
In ways you didnt care to see
How I danced along the howls of the winds
And greeted the butterflies so playfully

How my petals mimicked the warm colours
For a short moment before the sun sets
Or how they glistened against the moonlight
When the storm had finally taken rest

Can you appreciate all of my beauty
When it exists not to serve you?
Would you admire me from afar, knowing in the end
You have no right nor privilege to choose

What you think is best for me
Are only based on your standards alone
And your thoughts regarding what I need
Are only to the extent of what you know

I have grown alongside the harshest winds
I would not settle for a simple breeze
I do not waver against the thunderstorms
I was not made to cater to what you perceived

You see me as a fragile little flower
To take home like a small puzzle piece
So you could complete your picture at home
You took away my freedom for your own greed

Can you be content with loving me
As I am now and as you are?
Knowing you hold no monopoly
Over myself or any of my parts

If you truly love me, do not pick me
Let me stay where I have bloomed
I am content with all that I am
Knowing I am my own muse

The corner stone of the human race suppose to be morality, right?
Then why so much hate?
Which leads my thoughts to this chaotic mind space,
It poses me a question..If you may?
Is man good? or is man evil?
Which sparks this debate....

Man is wholeheatedly evil, lets start with Slavery,Racism,Guns, ****** and nuclear attacks, unwarranted tax, wiping out nations, then skewing historical facts.
Glossing over financial enslavement by glittering cracks.
Like take this virus situation, this whole view seems parallax.

Man is good, same as there was slavery there was slavery's end
Japan in essence has thrived since then
mistakes were made but we learned from it in the end.
you cant generalise, not all man is evil
same not as all man is good.
Somethings are not evil, just mistundestood
Show some compassion and the result with surprise you in more likelihood.

This is my point, there is always two side's to a coin
man were born as blank slate
unfortunately we all know how cruel is fate
some get born into safety others into heartache
with a loveless safety net.
i wish i could share my love with all of them...
in the end what control's good or or evil is the individual minds state
weather it's been exposed to love
more than septic hate.
terror breeds terror
same as love breeds love
this misconseption is a common mistake.
Its how fragile the mind is ....
the loss off hope....
this i believe is were evil lurks
Hungrily consuming our souls.

Insanity calling out to me seductively.
My whispered name floating on winds scented breath.
Peering out my window, though the silence is deafening, I can hear the screaming sound of silent death.

I can hear its unrest
If I listen even closer
I can hear it confess
It says that it's sorry, it knows it's a pest
However, this is it's nature
Like humans capturing beauty in cages, our nature's coded in the oppressed.

It's just doing what it's design to do
That is to destroy,
Or to survive
There's always two sides to a coin.
I personally think we to blame
This is what our destruction caused
This Earth is in pain.
I think it's defending itself
Yeah, maybe, I know
This sounds insane

Then I ask...

Would you not defend yourself
If you continually being flayed
The essence that is you
Gets repeatedly drained
Even the deepest of ocean is not safe
We are the human race, we infest every space
In our accomplishments
Beauty gets destroyed, captured in paintings
Get locked in a safe.

What I'm trying to convey
This virus is only giving in to it's nature
Same as the human race
It seems it's out to destroy
Until one day,
The earth will truly be grasping at it's last breath
Intoxicating air, the air not breathable, unfresh
Of feeling it's devoid.
With it's very last hope, the human race and it's virus, deaths will be deployed.