There was a night
Sitting in my room
Engulfed with pain
That old bedroom
With memories plastered on the walls
You sat next to me
Seeing the pain she had just put me through
You said to me
“It wasn’t your fault”
And i cried
Tears i’ve never cried before
Sadness
Anger
Relief someone saw it too
You held me
Ever so tight
Said you wouldnt let go
“It wasn’t your fault
It wasn’t your fault
It wasn’t your fault”
Made me scream it aloud
Until I knew it was true
You kept holding me while i cried
Thinking I’d always have you

You said it was all my fault
It’s not my fault you raised me this way
Your life
The ****** ways you grew
My life
Having to start anew
You blame me for the things I’ve learned from you
“Do what I say not as I do”
A ****** thing from the both of you
Tiptoeing around a line that was askew
Her teaching me things that will never be true
Lies from the mouths of people I knew
Reject
Neglect
Needs that would never be met
A million thoughts in my head
But only two that say what I wished I had said
*******

Speak
As though you've
Learned anything
You little stump
Of a man

When I confide
In you, just
Cut me off and
Talk about
The elements again

Listen
As though you've
Got any other
Motive but *******
Me someday

And I'll pretend
You're a friend
Until you do it
Again and then
I'm walking away

Don't feel so special

I've been abused,
Forcefully used,
Yet you think you can blow my fuse?
Don't feel so special.

I've hacked & sliced at my own skin,
Barely living,
So thin,
But you worry if you hurt my grin,
Don't feel so special.

You could have called me every bad name under the sun,
shot me with a gun.
But I've hurt me, more than you've ever could.
So don't feel so special.

I don't need closure,
Unless its from stitches,
Mending the pieces I've broke from myself.
But the damage you've done,
Is nothing I haven't done to myself.

So don't feel sorry.
Hold your tears of guilt upon a shelf.
They mean nothing to me,
But only for yourself.

So don't feel so special.
You are nothing but another person who dared to hurt me,
But only hurt themself.

An untold tale hides behind her dreary eyes
Of how he betrayed her innocence with beautiful lies
Forlorn words attempting to escape at the tip of her tongue
But even her mouth bleeds his name out
Her tiny voice could reach nothing
They'll just say,
'She's just a girl so young'
Even she screams at the top of her lungs.

For her story is just another folklore you'll ever hear
It could be passed on but never believed.

©kg

Turn the dial
on my back
and spin me around

Press the button
on my head
and push me down

Ring the bell
in my ear
bring on the sound

Push me off
the ledge
pick me off the ground

Check the crack
in the battery pack
no longer around

Your claws
They sank into flesh
Leaving scars so deep
They will never be healed
A cornfield
Somewhere you wanted to go
To take a part of me
That I would never get back
That room
The intense feeling of worthlessness
Panic attack
going back
Down the tunnel

Suddenly nothing else mattered
You were there
Your charm and humor
Suddenly I was ok
I used to watch as they walked all over me
Now I realize
I don’t deserve to be used
I am worth sacrifice
You give me your time
You call me yours
You aren’t ashamed
To be seen with me
To hold me
Out in the open
You stand up for me
When they stare and laugh
I feel safe next to you
I don’t know how long this will last
But I have issues and I have to ask
That you don’t use them against me
I don’t wanna jump all over you
But please don’t use it against me
I hope you see
I’m just scared
Hurt by way to many
I trust you
Don’t abuse that
I love you
Please don’t try to use that
My wrists are healed
I don’t want to reopen it
You fixed me
If you ever wanna leave
Let me down easy
I’m sorry if this scares you
I don’t wanna hurt you
I just want you to know what you’re getting into
Because what happens
When hands get put on me
More than you know
This is a warning

jeans sell for more
with a stone wash
stretching and tearing
gives straight legs
like you a hole
lot more soul