Your words don’t have to come out of your mouth anymore because I envision them. I envision them when I am walking in an unknown place, at 1 am and I am scared shitless but too weak to run. I envision them when I decide to sit in the rain instead of sitting out in the sun. I envision them when I accidentally cut myself, looking at the drops of blood falling on the floor. I envision them when I am on the bridge. Looking at the water flowing, always moving at the same pace because your words go through me like wind whipping fast past my hair. They were never words of encouragement, never words of kindness. But quick words of hatred and loathing, and now I know that when the plate hits the wall of my kitchen, and I look down to see the shattered pieces, instead of picking it up I like to just leave it there. Just how you left me. Broken.

Her hair
Flowing
All in one
Straight down her back
Her hair straight
With tints of brown
Maybe a shade lighter
Wrapped around
Other strands
Wrapped around
Her head
Her shoulders
Her neck
Her face
Wrapped around her body
And it doesn't stop
It keeps going
And going
Until she is
Covered
With
Her hair

When I see grey clouds
I think of you
I think of you because,
When I was watching
The rain
Pour down onto the road
And disappear
Running away
Streaming along finding places,
To hide
Places to disappear
It reminded me of how
You would follow the rain
Run towards it
Finding places
To hide
Places to disappear
Leaving me a step behind you,
When all I wanted to do
Was take one step forward
But you wouldn’t let me