When first the metal pierced me,
I knew then of release,
that elusive creature who flickers like a torch before disappearing
as though it had never been there a'tall.
The second time the spear went through,
my knees quaked and trembled,
but my lips were pressed tight as the pain took up its new home.
Years passed and I found myself raw,
aching for that strange freedom,
so I returned to the place with the bright hooks and glinting stones,
frozen still within a river of onlookers:
the ones who'd never felt true ecstasy and those who loved it as dearly as I.
For a third time I sit in the chair,
knowing all can see
how far my addiction has taken me.