This fear, it is unlike any i have dealt with before
fear of being, fear of knowing
fear of re-opening my sore

 these tears i hold on the edge of my lashes
come with the sudden heat my body radiates
i can feel my heart speeding, pounding in crashes

 i wish i could show you
how badly this hurts
i need to leave.  i feel like i have to. 

all i wish for is to have no emotion
to not feel this pain
to be happy.  that is my devotion