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Aug 2013
The night is almost gone, and the day is near.  
Therefore let us lay aside the deeds of darkness
and put on the armor of light.*

How pervasive this darkness
And how choking its black.
Very few could breath here.
I wonder at this starkness,
No, I wonder what it lacks,
Growing perhaps too accustomed to fear.

Does hope look any different though?
Or will light just show me the dark more clearly?
Neither day nor night seems relief to show,
Every hour clings me to life barely.

Every friend I tell holds my hand with weakness,
Venturing to guess at the reason I hold
Every new detail with certain bleakness,
Reviewing my case as a doctor would.
Yet none knows the depth of the wound in my soul,
Truly none knows how closely I hold this knife.
Hope they hold out as though I desired life.
I want only reprieve from this black-hearted control.
No, I desire not life but a way out, friend.
Give me pills or a pistol, that seems a sure end.

To admit this to my friend I would never,
Oh but there's One who has known it forever...

“Stand firm,” He commands,
To me quite a demand,
And I plead with Him I care no longer for life's light.
Neither for death's black, but on oblivion I have my sight,
Denying reality of both extremes.

For once, though, I consider, for once I wonder:
Is hope something different than the nightmares I dream?
Reviewing a bit, with a sense of washing over, I discover
Mustard seeds are really smaller than they seem.
Written by
Ahuvah Elohai
  990
 
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