Why do I laugh instead of cry?
when things turn to dust,
when I've forgotten how to speak,
or when I've cut myself open,
when I'm barely able to see,
when I think I might not last,
or when I know things look bleak,
when my tears never go uninterrupted,
when they're coated in a roaring laugh,
why do I always manage to look up,
and stop myself from feeling so sad?