So she takes me into a dim room with big green chairs and hands me her card
Blue, a calming color, probably on purpose
But the numbers and words all swirl together and make no sense
My eyes, oh they splash saltiness on my lips
"I'm sorry..."
She is deep with real profound empathy
Been in this room with every girl, every tear, every dream shattered
It's not her fault, though, so I somehow manage to summon the strength to half-smile
Manage to pick up the pieces of myself and move on like everyone else who walks out of that room
Out the door and into the sun and it seems kind of beautiful in a sad
Tragic kind of way
The ultimate doomed destiny of a life I created, that won't get to live
A miracle taken for granted
A waste yet a relief to have a future of my own
I can barely even function sometimes, constantly on emotional life-support
Invisible wires and tubes wrapped around my body, keeping me together
So how could I bring something into the world that will be just as miserable as I
Just as foreign to living as I've become myself
We'd just be two newborns kicking and screaming away the day
Wanting to get out of this prison that the act of breathing comes along with.