I will write you out of my stupid head
On black paper that I have slightly colored
By my bitter-sweet tears that poored on it

My make up's washed away and beauty's dead
My trembling fingers grab a pen I borrowed
From you when you had no need of it

For many months all my daydreams were lead
By your shadow they have obeyed and followed
They're dead now, I have no need of it

I wanna live an absurd
I wanna live in pain
I wanna feel excitment
And dance in colored rain

You are the one who made me
Feel alive again
You are the one who taught me
Cruel rules of this sweet game

You are my grug, my teacher
My love, my dark champagne
In my dreams you're the torture
My absurd, my bright pain

What ****** me off the most is your smell
What ****** me off the most is that look
You give me and throw me into prison cell
What ****** me off the most is the hook
That makes me interested in what you'll do next
What ****** me off is the sound of youк steps
When you walk up the stairs and send a text
To your stupid, lost and ruined friends
What ****** me off the most is your fricking voice
Your tone and the notes you sing out when you lie
It's like a pinch in my heart, it lives me no choice
It wakes up my anger, I wish it could die
What ****** me off is the light in your eyes
Everybody have eyes, why yours seem so special?
But I won't surrender to your spell, my mind fights
With my stupid beliefs that you're my obsession

I don't need you in my life
You're just my inspiration
You're just a tool with which I draw
The portrait of solvation

"I don't need you in my life" -
That is just a lie
I tell myself to fall asleep
As I slowly die

Your head's no longer on my shoulder
Your breath no longer tickles me
Without you weather feels much colder
And my words are no longer free

We used to sit down by the fire
And of your tears my hair were wet
I used to calm down your desire
To chase what you cannot get yet

I felt like you'll be my defender
And yours forever I will be
You've ripped my page from the calendar
And to another you will flee

I never said how much I loved you
Because I felt no need for it
I thought you knew my life's about you
And now by you another's life is lit

No walls around me, fresh air
I breathe it through my heart
The wind plays with my silver hair
Creates the piece of art
It's over now, the blood-red age
Of fighting and of fear
Of people being put in cage
Of dangers that were near
I lived it all, I lived the deaths
Of people that I loved
My soul has died from the offence
Of ones that I adored
But I've restored myself somehow
For twenty hundred times
But it can hurt me until now
When my body dies
My body dies after I lived and danced on edge of knife
My love, emotions and my faith, please, try to stay alive

I'll keep on writing until my hands will bleed
I'll write myself out; my sorrows and my greed
I have replaced some other face with yours
I have denied that you're made of closed doors
And even though at start you were a game
A trifle that will pull me out of shame
A fake reflection of my own revolution
Of the one who seemed to be solution
No matter how long will I grow your seed
My garden craves for it, it is in need
No matter how hard I try to close my eyes
And then wake up next morning, without belief in lies
You are not just reflection anymore
You're part of me now, you're the closed door.