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Isha Natsu Apr 2017
warmer
softer
lovelier
just for you

happier
luckier
sweeter
when I’m with you

yours
yours
yours
just that
Isha Natsu Apr 2017
This is us,
meeting at the curve
to be set apart
coming close
to never meeting again
Isha Natsu Mar 2017
my mother likes to think i can’t see
her dabbing her eyes dry,
that long, lost love is not something that is pieced
together into the equivalents of promises
and vows
yours have been broken
mine just beginning to birth
we are lying motionless
in this game
whose pieces are pawns of fate
and cruel intentions
for the strength it took to leave
is as brittle as the ground i forged for abandonment
and my poetry is as stale
as warm beer you drink just to forget
Isha Natsu Mar 2017
It's strange how I could fit so much in a shoebox. A shoebox made for a pair.
There is this specific shoebox I have tucked underneath my folding bed.
A relatively new one, with its glossy lid and blunt corners.
I can name its contents by heart.
A letter dated September 27.
Two pairs of tickets to movies.
A priceless photo of you as a kid on horseback.
Six receipts I managed to save from places where we've shown our true colors.
Nine bus tickets.
One valentine's card with a doodle I'd frame in the Louvre for everyone to appreciate.
A list that says ten things but actually has twenty. My favorite one being "I love that you love me. I cannot even."
Two poems.
Five photographs of us, two of you, one stolen, most with teeth, some wacky.
An ice cream tin. I can still taste the pistachio and see our smiles while we shared and fought over who gets the tin.
A notebook holding a sacred bucketlist, boxes unticked.
This box is small, but it keeps a lot more than that.
It cradles a semi-epic backstory.
It possesses a playlist inaudible to all, except for two people.
It confines a few arguments, little squabbles, and maybe a tiny bit of resentment.
More than that, it is abundant in affection, concern, last-minute cuddles, kisses given and taken.
I won't deny it, I'm a sentimental person.
I've been keeping and snatching little parts of you and placing them in plain sight around me.
Where I can see them, see you, when I flip through my books or open my wallet for change.
But now you're gone, hidden from view. Diminished inside four corners, right under where I sleep at night to forget you.
It's strange how I could fit so much in a shoebox. This shoebox I made just for you and I.
Isha Natsu Mar 2017
I want you to bury my heart along with my hands
So I cannot grasp your skin with every empty throb and beat.
Picture me with you
Picture us. For at least one last time
I am with you.

If I never fall in love again,
Give me your eyes,
The gift of sight to see what you worship. To adore
the footsteps you take further and further away from me.
It would take too long for me to forget. You
Whose prayers I’ve been repeating for too long.

If I never fall in love again,
Break me one last time
Leave crevices for me to find. Pieces of you
Still hurting and healing. I am
Not going to walk away.

When I fall in love again,
Allow me to do dance with you one last time.
Melancholy is inching its way through.
If I fall in love again,
Let it not be with you.
Isha Natsu Mar 2017
I don’t know if it’s just me or
The six bottles of beer I just had,
But this body misses that body
And I know I could be drunk
To want to kiss your lips
And unfold you
like paper cranes
with worn out creases
but too beautifully assembled
And I am sure I am sober
Enough to love your crooked smiles
And wicked grins
That my stuttering and stammering
Broken “I miss you”s
Would show I am stumbling
For sentences cohesive enough to stick
To the back of your mind
Only to recall and rehearse my drunken stupor
At 1 AM when you accidentally wake up
And you can’t remember the difference
Between wanting and waiting
Isha Natsu Mar 2017
My poetic senses will grow stale
The words escaping me each and every time
For I know what it’s like
To be immortalized
In love and heartbreak
To be worshiped
In song and in ode
To be penned
Too many times until you lose all meaning
This is not you
You are not ideal
You are as surreal as hurt
We are as casual as fiction
I will not romanticize you to the point of lucidity
And the tides will not turn when you arrive
The stars will not fall when you leave
The world will not stop for us
The words of love will not come
All because I will not love you like a writer
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