Oct 30

Don't bother with Halloween costumes,
Like the monster wielding an axe,
Dress up as an unexpected bill,
Or a demand to pay more tax.

Pretend to be negative equity,
An inadequate pension pot,
An interest rate that's climbing,
Or a sinkhole under our plot.

You don't even need to wear scary garb,
You can spook us with what you say,
Tell men they're beginning to lose their hair,
Or women they're turning grey.

For these are the things that scare us,
And truly give us a fright,
Tell us we're facing redundancy,
And you'll keep us awake at night.

But if all that fails to move us,
And you're feeling really bold,
Just remind us we'll never be young again,
And say we look really old.

Before you ask, I have no idea what a "negative equity" costume would look like.

But the very thought of it scares the hell out of me.
Oct 26

Back in the Hundred Years' War,
At the Battle of Agincourt,
A few English bods,
Won against the odds,
Even though the French had more.

A belated contribution to the 600th anniversary, with apologies to Mr William Shakespeare.
Sep 8

It started with just one man,
Who imported a plant from Japan,
He sent it to Kew,
The bloody thing grew,
Now it spreads wherever it can.

Japanese Knotweed.

Fortunately, I don't have this in my garden.

Sep 7

Always there on my favourite tracks,
From the great days of 2 Tone,
The wonderful sound of Rico,
And his legendary trombone.

RIP Rico Rodriguez (1934-2015)

Aug 24

Abandoned by my maker,
I braved the world alone,
Following my destiny,
To make it on my own.

Driven by potential,
The journey has been long,
Battered by adversity,
Adventure made me strong.

Do not try to own me,
My spirit must be free,
I'm nobody's plaything,

A tribute to one of my favourite books when I was growing up: "Paddle to the Sea", by Holling Clancy Holling.

Jun 12

A tavern full of bawdy song,
Wenches serving beer,
Dark words about the castle,
Where virgins disappear...

Lightning strikes the battlements,
The villagers take fright,
A coffin lid creaks open
As howling fills the night.

Carriages and horses,
Bodices and hats,
Screaming from the forest,
Demons, wolves and bats.

Lots of bouncing bosoms,
Blood and guts galore,
Ghosts and ghouls and skeletons,
And corpses by the score.

But now the hero fights back,
With crucifix and stake,
And evil is defeated,
As dawn begins to break.

Re-posted to mark the death of Sir Christopher Lee. I know he played many other roles in his career, but for me, he will always be Count Dracula!

May 23

Many characters came and went,
Since nineteen seventy eight,
But you were the very first one,
To walk through Grange Hill's gate.

RIP Terry Sue Patt (1964-2015)

Terry was one of the original cast of the children's TV series "Grange Hill". Playing the football-mad character Benny Green, he was actually the first of the pupils to appear on screen. Later in life, Terry worked as an artist.

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