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Bea Oct 2014
I see you grin from ear to ear
and dissolve into laughter
but I know you're still stuck
in that labyrinth
where you drown in pain
...
When you smile (cry),
when you laugh (break down),
I just want to brush my lashes on your cheek
and let you feel my lips on your nose and eyes
my fingertips on your spine
on your fragile, breaking parts
I want to collapse into you
when your heart is bursting
and falling into pieces
I want to hold you so close
when your bones are chilling
and
I'll kiss your knuckles
even before they start to bleed

I want every piece of me
to crash into every piece of you,
*Babe
// unfinished //
Bea Oct 2014
We're trying to save each other
trying to put back flickers
trying to mend each other's guts
trying to attach our broken parts
trying to complete each other

but no matter how hard we try
we just can't.

Something temporary
like what we are
could never fix a deep
gaping
fathomless
**pain
// should we keep or stop trying //
Bea Oct 2014
GET ATTACHED

He’ll get bored and annoyed
lose interest
find someone else
leave—
SOON

DON’T GET USED TO TALKING TO HIM
everyday
every weekend
when you’re happy
                   sad
             empty
     stressed
lost

I don’t want to have
to miss him
I don’t want to remember
the feel of his touch or
the warmth of
his hug, his cuddles
or the taste of his lips

DON’T GET ATTACHED,
YOU DON’T KNOW
HOW TO LET GO

He will leave anyway
He will leave you soon
Everyone does… maybe
just maybe

he’s no different
Bea Aug 2014
x
"I'm a mess"
"but you are my mess"
Bea Aug 2014
He plays with my hair
He holds my hand in the crowd
on the bench where we both sat
squeezes it tightly when we cross streets
because he knows I'm scared
He rubs my shoulder
my back
my spine
He wraps his arm around my waist
around me
He takes pictures of us
smiling
laughing
hugging
and asks "kiss me?"
I licked his cheek and I got that stare
THAT stare
that makes me want
and crave for him more

but everything is temporary
one day I'll wake up and
you're gone
because we're just bored
we just wanna get into this
different kind of fun

I know you're not gonna save me
not even asking for it
You'll damage me
unconsciously

we are temporary

but right now
all I feel is you're my drug--
destructive
and addictive
You'll damage my body
my insides
my mind


you damage me
Bea Jul 2014
I've always loved the idea of you
but whenever I think of it--
how your hair touches your ears
how round and deep your eyes are
how your dimple on your left cheek shows
how you laugh when I whisper my lame jokes
how you go for a drive when you're not in the mood
when you remind me to do my papers even when you miss talking to me
how you send your good morning messages
and how you struggle to type when you're sleepy
when you listen to music almost the whole day
when you listen to my endless stories
how you smile while watching chick flicks on cable
how you strum your guitar
how you find it cute when I rant
how you fancy our ear piercings
when you share how your day went
and your someday plans with me
how you make pancakes
and my every days--
every time I think of you
I feel this addictive pain in my chest
and every time I do
I wish that it would be the last time
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