(same day as III)
I'm broken & hurt
disdain & depressed-
but I must say,
I just don't know
what to do next.
I;m selfish I know.
Too easy to gloat.
for lack of better words,
I'm that kid you shouldn't know.
I have never known family,
for I have never been it.
too scared to love-
my heart is nowhere in it.
The world would be much nicer,
if I was just not in it.
wasted flesh, lies, and broken resolve.
they must have been right-
to call me a dog.
I've fought it. I've tried.
all of those lies.
it's easy. I'm fine.
just don't look me in the eyes.
or better yet do
and point as you do.
nose now full size
they've known of all my lies.
no better than the last
I think I'll just go.
Cupcakes my only facet
sorry--
that's the last of it.
and it seems I'm not the only one
with plans to just go.
No,
it's ok- really.
another broken story.
but I still feel I'm not worth it-
to wake up in the morning.
I'm sick of feeling
like there's nothing left
for me.
and thus I waited to post all these, keep me safe and full of ease.
just one more night of sanity.