She looked directly in my eyes,
and then she looked away.
It really came as no surprise,
that I should feel this way.

I'd seen it coming for so long,
I knew what lie in store.
I simply wanted one more song,
I yearned for just one more.

For she could take my breath away,
with songs so sweet and clear.
I'd go to listen every day,
just for the chance to hear.

To be around that strong sweet voice,
I could not help but smile.
Each day I had no other choice,
but to listen for awhile.

Who am I to want for more?
She's gone now....  yet I linger.
Yearning for what went before,
inspiration I could bring her.

In dreams last night I heard the phone,
a constant steady ringing.
I said hello to a voice unknown,
until I heard the singing.

I saw that man fall in the street.
It was like he suddenly
lost his feet.
His sign went flying,
as did my mood.
I should've been crying,
will work for food.

I saw my friend breaking down.
She needed those pills,
but they weren't around.
Her hands were shaking,
as was my mind.
Her heart was breaking,
yet I left her behind.

I heard the sirens again tonight.
My stupid neighbors,
another fight.
I've seen that girl,
we spoke once or twice.
She's not in my world,
I've been more then nice.

There will always be something wrong.
Some lost soul
some sad song.
There will always be people,
to rearrange it.
But God, just once,
can we try to change it?

How many times do we say and do things that we do not really mean to say and do ?

A poke, a cerebral nudge, something to get attention and evoke a response from beneath the veil to the farthest deepest darkest sky’s bluest hue

Methinks it starts very early in Life - in some type of observation mode
A view of interactions factions and ego-id tractions experienced once the mouth has spoken and the river of effect has flowed

The thought was being cute with a turn of a phrase flipped over and bounded
It takes a quick wit to send and a quicker wit to receive the intended double entendre

But shock there can be and shock there is
Communication of a thought to generate a smile often takes a big hit
Is there really wisdom in seeing multiple years ?
Does something vague and leathery to the heart know and tell us when to quit ?

Encounter Engage Expand
Surround Life with a warm out-flowing rainbow thought of walking somewhere that you feel the earth between Your toes
Think about nothing for as long as You can
Put the past in its proper space
Breathe in the current moment with a smile on our face

Remove second thoughts about what could have been
Release any interaction errors and turn Your back to the wind
Remain as relentless as the march of time in situ
Smile for the now knowing we have passed the shock value
vY

one, two, three
one, two, three
one, two, three
i count the seconds that pass by me
floating away
into the unknown
there is a scene laid out in front me
with the actors and actresses taking their places
i am simply a side character
watching the plot unfold
some friends besides me
a couple of laughs drift away in the distance
they escape my grasp
i can’t seem to touch anything

everything is too perfect, too good, too scripted
everything is right in front of me
life is awaiting ahead
not even an inch away
yet it’s not real
i’m not real
i can’t feel real.

- a.g.

for Tascha

deep in the pond of unhappy, swimming,
drowning the next contemporaneous
depression thought quickly swallowed,
desperation in quick glances everywhere,
dawn is no consolation but just another
daily drawing tighter of twine cutting
disillusionment


dear god, commences every thought,
delayed answers have yet to arrive,
**** the deity's non-responsivness,
dare not say out loud lest,
deserved fates be worse, be realized,
didn't know? how can that be?
disguiser par excellent, I am the original
deceiver

But I never think about

death or dying, for that would be
defeat finale, a statute to, a status of none, a
destiny some wick spark, still insists can be
deferred

differed always,
diffidently, but grasping yet at the
double entendre that is my
dark vision of a future already past

May 2015

On a long stretch of highway
his thumb to the road,
Leon set off to lighten his load.
No thoughts of tomorrow
no plans set in stone
just a few hundred bucks,
and a dream of his own.

Leon was weary of playing the game.
His boss and his girl,
they both thought the same.
Their griping and wanting
was keeping him tied
to a life that he loathed,
left him weary inside.

He would act on an impulse,
and finally be free
to do as he liked, and be who he'd be.
A fantasy stirring could finally come true!
No end to the wonderful things he could do.

For hours he walked,
while the headlights flashed by
light on his feet and a smile to the sky.
While on that same blacktop
Jenny drove on
anxious to make it to Phoenix by dawn.

It may have been fate or say what you will
that she spied him on time
as she came up the hill.
Surely this guy must be needing a ride
so she pulled to the shoulder,
letting Leon inside.

Jenny felt guarded while driving along,
not accustomed to helping who didn't belong
in the world that she lived,
and the life that she led,
ain't it funny how sometimes we do what we dread?

Her worries subsided in such a short while,
for he talked with such ease.
He had such a nice smile!
It's true what they say,
you just never know
who you might meet if you give it a go.

Just outside Phoenix the sun started rising
when Leon said "Jenny, ain't it surprising?
I feel like I've known you my entire life."
The last words she heard,
as he pulled out his knife.

Ain't it funny how sometimes we do what we dread?
Leon's still dreaming,
while Jenny lies dead.



.