hello. how do you do
what did you do
do to your face
to make that smile so beautiful

hello. do you want a drink
a glass of wine
filled to the brink
so I can take you home with me

to take off your clothes
take them all off
to let me make love to those scars
that you so deeply loathe

you like to come
and soothe my wounds
caress my skin, as
my shirt comes undone

   . . .

you like to leave
without a trace
my heart ripped from my chest
tied to your shoelace

Nicholas.

In the middle of my thoughts
You arrived in blaze and found
The remnant of my drunken, bleeding heart.

You were relentless
In pursuit of re-existence
From ashes and fragmented hopes

That exhausted afternoon
At scorching 4 o’clock
In the corner of the room

On the creases and the pillows
We shed our clothes
And re-assembled eternity.

I bet you didn’t realize that most of the things I told you I hadn’t told anyone, and still haven’t. I know that I didn’t end up telling you a lot of things, because I knew that telling you would be admitting to myself that everything I said was real. but now that you’re gone I can’t help but wonder that if I had told you this, then maybe you would have stayed. or if I had told you that, then maybe you would have just ended up leaving with more parts of me than you already have. I don’t believe that I’ll ever truly be able to be myself again, or at least my old self because of you. almost all of the old parts of me were shared with you and now I’ll never be able to get them back. So thanks for stealing everything that I was..