As classy as a 40 oz and boxed wine
As classy as a 40 oz and boxed wine
  2d  Scotty
2 days ago

The poets will tell you
Again and again
What a terrible idea it is
To fall in love with them

But don’t listen
Because they are all liars

Even when they say they are moody
Dark and depressive and
Full of broody angst

That they will rip out your soul
Smash your heart to smithereens
Because they are ugly, damaged
Creatures that will only hurt you
Only cause you pain

Or that they are incapable
Of fully loving
Anything but their pen

That paper is their only friend
And that no one is this world
Could possibly understand
Never comprehend

Every one of us knows
The sad truth

Just look at our poetry
And you will see
Hidden in plain sight
If you read in between the lines

Please, stay away
*I love you, I love you, I love you*
From me

I've said it before but I'll say it again anyway.
2 days ago

What am I but your jester?
Good for cheap laughs, I'm just the Addam's uncle fester

What if I can't seem to make you laugh the way I used to?
What if you find another cat that better suits you?
I'm sorry to even ask, it's just something that I'm used to
But how much longer do you think this will all last before I lose you?

4 days ago

If God gave me wings, why fly above volcanoes?
Why do I hide from the sun yet dance with tornadoes?
Why do I frolic with the demons in a city of angels?
And why is there a self destruct button on this halo?

I was determined to be biblical but now I'm nothing to this earth
I'm nothing but a stain for I have depleted all my worth
I set fire to my wings and flew straight into that church
So they pulled the feathers off my back and tossed me to the curb

You see...
I gave up all I had for a taste of Adam's apple
And went from a saint to a sinner...
From an angel to an asshole

  4d  Scotty
N' Geekryn Coulombe

The yellow aura
spiraled my night elf hunter avatar
as the DUN-DUMM
of false accommplishment
incited my addiction to
instant gratification.

I had just Leveled up.

The quest giver
gave me a choice

Shitty boots
a less shitty Dagger

I took the shitty boots
fuck the system
they looked cooler.

I was going to stomp cave spiders anyway,
what's the point of relinquishing
looking damn fine.
for an extra Attack Point?

Shitty Boots.

Shitty boots ALL Day long.

A naked human avatar
facing a naked gnome
Named: "Buzz Lightyear"
He is Also dancing,
at crotch height.

This is Typical starting zone

I stayed up
watching Toonami all night
Naruto, Bleech, Inuyasha.
I could tell the sun came up
not because there was a window in my Kitchen,
there wasn't.

Tom and Jerry came on.
everyone knows
when Tom and Jerry came on
you were no longer pulling an
"all nighter."
You're pulling a
"Drink enough Soda
to get through the rest
of the day-er"

My entire diet
these past two days
has consisted of Gushers & Vault
Clearly Coca-Cola is superior
to Pepsi.

Therefore, Vault
was superior to Mountain Dew.
Which is the typical choice drink
of my internet brethren.

I don't know why I dyed my hair black nobody online could see it
But it made me feel
like my Night Elf Avatar

I wanted long white hair
I realized that's impossible
in 6th grade
So I Bought & Settled for Black
At least I could be like
"L" from death note,
Long sleeve white shirt, jeans
with no shoes.

I could also be
any other black-haired charecter
From any other angsty Anime
Because of course I loved angsty Anime
Because I held my cell phone like "L"
From Death Note.

I always dreamed
of this singing venus fly trap.

A Fuzzy Memory with a lost Origin
I realized seven years later
the Singing venus flytrap in my head
was AUDREY 2
from Little Shop Of Horrors.

Netflix reunited us in College
Audrey 2 finally Serenaded Me.
I listened with Voyeuristic Intentions
As memory saprilings grew
into the full songs
relieving the void in my soul
Lingering for a Man to be attacked
by a singing venus fly trap
in his own kitchen.

But only once,
Because I firmly beleived
movies should only be seen once
until I stopped
dyeing my hair black.
Despite watching Space jam
more times than any kid born in 1995 Should have
but still
all the kids born in 1995
watched space jam
more than any of them should have
because they were born in 1995.

when I first saw little shop of horrors
it aired just before osmosis jones.

I love osmosis jones
almost as much as I love
Buzz lightyear, of Star Command

Buzz lightyears robot companion XR
reminded me of Cyberchase
and to this day Cyberchase
is the best show to watch
when you have no idea
who Gilbert Godfrey is.

Zoombinis is better
than oregon trail.
and also better
than Tom and Jerry.
but not better
than leveling my night elf Hunter.

I think I spent more time
getting my Zoombinis
to look just right
then I Spent deciding
what outfit to wear

Black striped Hoodie
Unwashed and worn every day
Grey skulls all over it, because
of course it had grey skulls all over it.
Black pants.
Black socks
No actually, THESE black socks.
Okay, got gushers
and my Coca-Cola.

I now take as much time
to choose my outfit as
designing the perfect Zoombini.
however I have yet to replace
my legs
a skateboard.

I think that every grade before sixth grade is fourth grade
and 6th grade is basically 7th grade
which is to say my memory skips them both
to remember ending eighth grade

I miss being cool on the Internet
Whilst lame and forgotten in real life.

like black sock
wasn't quite as good
as that other Black sock.

I wanna go back.
To the seperation
Of who we pretend to be
Vs. who we actually are.
To be dramatic again.

An ideal self on the internet
Who is obviouslly not the real you
is decades more comforting
than Some Characatureized
Facebook Profile.

Today I was offered a choice

Work A minimum wage job
continue my useless college degree.

I decided to write a poem, because
fuck the system.
If I am to Decide where to respawn from
Let it be poetry.

There is no spiraling Yellow aura

Sometimes there is snapping though.
Or a lost memory
of A singing venus Fly Trap.

I am a pretend person.
An avatar
just now, I have skin.
You can touch me
I breath without a Macro
or even pressing any keys.

I cannot bring myself to
Watch Space Jam again.
I can Identify Gilbert Godfrey's voice.
I will buy my children zoombinis
And it will collect dust
When all they want
Is to watch the fifth Toy Story movie
Way more than any kid born in 2020 should.
And all the kids born in 2020
Will Watch the fifth Toy Story Movie
Way more than they should
because they
will have been born
in 2020.

And I will rant
about the Missing LGM
and Warp Darkmatter
betraying Buzz Lightyear
By joining Evil Emperor Zurg
So Buzz was forced
to get three new Partners
Princess Mira Nova
Audrey 2
and Osmosis Jones.
because I will have Forgotten
Booster & XR.
Because Booster and XR
Never made a god-damned Facebook Profile.

Nobody exists anymore.
We are all represented by our avatars
holding ourselfs up to the standards
of our photoshopped reflections

Being disappointed and overwhelmed

I Take pills to forget that I am
Acting Like myself
but can't find any evidence of Existing.
Besides these memories
of who i used to be.

I want my internet persona
to be nothing like me
So that I may focus on myself
in the real world coherently.

I want thick black lines
dividing mental Venn diagrams

I want Tom and Jerry
To signal me
That it is morning, again.

#sun   #world   #loss   #tom   #nostalgia   #school   #gaming   #internet   #jerry   #polite  
5 days ago

I wrote a poem titled "Afterthought"
Well this is the fucking sequel!
Because it's getting harder and harder to reach out to you
Standing in the back of all these people

So again...
I hate that I'm your afterthought
That chubby kid in gym class
That one you've always overlooked
You know...
The one that's always chosen last

I said..
I hate that I'm your afterthought
Because I stand behind the greats
For I'm no Pablo Neruda with the ink
Nor am I Pablo Picasso with the paint

I said...
I hate that I'm your afterthought
The sixth member off your list
After one through five have made you cry
I'm suddenly the one that's missed

I said...
I hate that I'm your afterthought
You've got me hanging by a thread
I said..
"I hate that I'm your afterthought"
The words you've never read

Feb 17

I could be the crutch to aid your knees when that baggage gets too heavy
And when the tears come flooding out your eyes, I'll be the one to hold the levee
And when your balance gets too shaky, I'll be the one to hold you steady
I could be the that light to shine on your darkness nights...
Well that's only if you'd let me

But that's just it...
"Only if you'd let me"
Spoken like a self loathing romantic
I mean...
I'm far from a knight in shining armor and that's a problem that I can't fix
For I too, have baggage as well and they've done a number on my knees
Like how my anxiety shakes my mental state and it gets hard for me to breathe
Or like how the scars around my chest are prone to open up and bleed
There's a laundry list of reasons why you should be with anyone but me

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