7.13° N, 125.6° E


15:41

You were leaving.

I could have asked you
A thousand things
In the time we spent together.

I could have asked you
For the real reason
As to why you chose to spend
Those past few nights with me
In this nameless, blameless city.

I could have asked you
Who or what you were thinking of
In the times that you fell silent
And stared off into the distance.

I could have asked you
If you thought that
Coming here was a mistake
And that you'd rather be somewhere else,
Lost in the arms of someone else.

I could have asked you how I never
Heard you utter my name and yet
The taste of his name still lingered
On your lips and on your tongue
And down your throat.

I could have told you
A thousand things
In the time we spent together.

I could have told you
How I wanted everything,
And yet nothing, to change.

I could have told you
That the people we used to love
Didn't have to ruin the memories
Of things we cherished the most
Or the memories that we were
About to create.

I could have told you
About how leaving was such sweet misery
And yet it didn't have to mean
Saying goodbye.

About how I was still uncertain
About everything.
About you, about me.

About what this was
And where all of this
Was going.

But no.
I tried my hardest not to.
I was too busy drowning
In the things I wanted to ask
And the things I wanted you to say
That I forgot
That it wasn't going to matter
Soon enough.


16:02**

You were already gone
Before you even left.

i’ve lost myself,
far from the rush
of the maddening crowd,
in a city that has fallen silent,
its vestige crumbling,
its past unspoken,
its reality slowly fading.

you are that city
awash with stories
i can no longer tell,
except perhaps in my mind,
in my thoughts,
where the aftertaste
of you still lingers.

If I can't find you in this lifetime,
I'll find you in another.
I'll wait for you forever,
you'll always be my lover.

The air feels heavy in the daylight.
Morning noise falls through the cracks.
Like unwelcome guests.

I do nothing.
But breathe in. Inhale. Corrode
Heretic lungs weighed down by sighs.
Combust. Purify. In fumes of nicotine
And smoke of papal white. Aware
Each breath burning away at life.

Eyes that see no oversight.
Curtained in ******* light,
Fade out of view

The room is shun away
The world lies flourish
I have made an enemy
Out of the Day.