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Àŧùl 6d
I'm again in a transition,
A non-medical scientist by my schooling,
A writer, singer-poet, and author by passion,
These days I'm at Gorakhpur to join a new job,
For another new opportunity that I grabbed,
One of the many exams I cracked,
This job is that of an Assistant Audit Officer.

I marvel at what life has shown me,
Educated at school in non-medical sciences,
Physics, Chemistry, Math, English & Physical Education.

Then I undertook the first paradigm career shift,
Started my Bachelor degree in Biotechnology
Met with the unfortunate cataclysmic road accident,
Survived the 23-day coma against all odds.

Oh the odds, do you remember, oh life?
200+ beats per minute heart rate in the coma,
104°F+ fever accompanied the ****** injuries,
Fractured cheekbone just below the left eye.

The second paradigm shift here was my survival.

They said at the hospital,
"Only the most serious cases come to ICU #2,
And the lost cases come to HDU #7."

BUT I DIDN'T DIE.

I survived everything that you threw on me,
Everything, even negative people,
Who made weird recommendations.

What did they recommend to my parents after the accident?
— to make me join an easier degree course,
— to make me train for weaving baskets,
— to set up a toffee shop for me to earn bread,
— and what not to discourage my family,
— my parents had dreams for their only child,
— all the whilst I was in the uncertain coma,
— and the pitiable vegetative state for 30 more weeks,
— where I endured immense pains.

Oh life, you've been so hard!
You gave me COVID-SARS in 2012,
I didn't die,
I completed my B.Tech in Biotechnology.

More loneliness followed,
I still didn't give up on life,
Completed my M.Tech in Animal Biotechnology.

The third paradigm shift was next,
When I cleared 4 recruitment exams,
And joined as a Probationary Officer
With the State Bank of India.

The fourth paradigm shift now comes,
I have shifted to the job of an Assistant Audit Officer,
With the Comptroller & Auditor General of India.

I defeated death,
But I seem to be fighting a lost battle
Against loneliness in my life.
My HP Poem #1960
©Atul Kaushal
Àŧùl Jan 31
You missed meeting me on May 7 in 2010,
You're one special memory among my men.

I rang you up before that accident,
And I knew not that I would fall then.

But you were depressed,
I looked to cheer you up addressed.

You were too gloomy,
You refused to accompany me.

I met with that accident,
And the rest is a historical dent.

The education system,
Me and you it did stem.

You found your calling,
Switched to highschool tuting.

I parried forward,
Kept crawling.

Though you gave up on your graduation,
I parried forward,
Yes, I carried my graduation forward.

A Bachelor of Technology degree takes 4 years,
I took 6, but it's fine, it's fine.

I'm proud of myself for not giving up,
When even bright students like you quit.

You kept your parents in the dark,
Never told them your true marks until they found it out by themselves.

Buddy, you could've just told me instead of quitting on it,
I could've made you study and work on yourself.

Look at me,
Just look at me.

I completed my B.Tech Biotechnology degree,
Instead of giving up even when my mother was not sure.

The whole world thought I could not complete my graduation,
But I even went to graduate school and obtained a postgraduate degree.

After I met with that accident, people suggested my parents,
To help set up a small shop for me to support my life beyond them.

But I never gave up,
I never gave up.

I can visualize Death waiting for me by my ICU bedside,
And I can also see it in anguish after getting defeated by my resilience.

Although I failed to obtain a PhD as COVID made me change my plans,
I bounced back in full glory and tasted worldly success.

I cracked not just one competitive recruitment exam,
But I cleared as many as 4 of them.

Now, old friend, I'm happy where you're headed to with your splendid performance at your coaching effort, yes, I respect your decision,
But you used to be smarter than I was at school.

We sang together,
Yes we did.

I played the guitar & sang,
You played the keyboard & sang more melodiously.

Oh, I remember what happened when we covered a popular song,
The Bollywood song is called “To Phir Aao.”

I started playing the riff,
“Tede-dede, Tede-dede,
Tede-dede, Tedede-Tede,”

But then your mobile went off,
“Ting-ding-ding, Tiding-ting,
Ting-ding-ding, Ting-tidingting.”

We had just begun it along my rhythm guitars & Digitech Effects Processor's electronic drums sampler on my Marshal amplifier,
You were prepared to start singing in your melodious voice,
But your phone started to ring as soon as we began.

Still we continued the recording after you rejected the call,
So, brother, did you forget the lesson we both taught ourselves?

Let the world be on fire,
Let it distract you as much as it wants to spend its ire.

I never gave up on my bachelor's degree,
I even went on to get my postgraduate degree,
I could've even achieved a PhD title,
But the COVID19 pandemic made me change my plans.

But bro, why did you forget the lesson so soon?

Anyway, let bygones be bygones.

Now if someone comments that you couldn't complete the graduation you started at a top University,
I tell them that you're happy doing something that pays you well,
You have completed a B.Sc in Math, and an M.Sc too,
Now you are doing your B.Ed,
And you're happily married to a charming woman.
My HP Poem #1959
©Atul Kaushal
Àŧùl Jan 22
On May 7, 2010, I had had met with a life-threatening road accident that put me in a 23-day comatose state and a minimally conscious vegetative state for 3 months thereafter.
A former friend led me to this beautiful platform created by our Eliot York, the computer engineer from England.
I had written a grand poem about how I felt about the ethos and pathos of romance in my spiritual account.
Born as an only child to my parents in our nuclear family, I developed high affinity towards any kind of love, affection and attention sent my way. Consequently, I tried to collate with an ideal lover, but she was always an illusion.

Unfortunately over the years, I kept breaking up with consecutive girlfriends due to miscellaneous reasons. But having written the poem that I call ‘Angel?’ has helped me receive such admiration for it such that I have realized that the love I seek outside has actually been always housed in my heart.

In the accident, I lost all my friends as all of them moved on. I can't blame them. Everyone has an own life to live. And why would anybody wait for a man who is academically and physically challenged?

Although now I'm a successful professional in the public sector and I'll soon transit to government sector.

I feel grateful to everyone here who I have read or who has expressed liking for my poetry.

Thank you everyone for teaching me one thing or the other.
Àŧùl Jan 14
I shall marry you one day soon,
To bring you to my world.
Then take you out to the hills,
To make love in the snowy whorl.

You might lose something,
But me you shall gain.
We'll make love under the moonlight,
You'll experience no pain.

I have a dream about us,
To bring new life to the planet.
We must become united as one body,
And one soul for this one love.

That one love will be our daughter,
Who we will kindle as our love,
Then we'll not deprive her of happiness,
We'll give her a sibling as well.

I am so sure that we'll have a daughter first,
Well, that's because I have a lot of love inside,
Such love for you and my future,
And we'll always thank the Moon for its love.
My HP Poem #1795
©Atul Kaushal
Àŧùl Jan 9
I really-really-really wanna take you home,
Tonight - tonight - yes, tonight.
You would feel relaxed when you spend the night,
With me in my bed - in my bed.

I really-really-really make a promise to you this evening,
Tonight be unlike any other you'd ever see.
You would feel the joy when you spread your pretty smile,
Watching me sink in my bed - in my coffin.

First I'd kiss into your mind a termination signal,
A signal which is mine.
I promise it'd be painless and clean altogether,
Death comes sooner.

The blanket over us will be our gravestone,
Tonight, yes, you try dying.
Try dying tonight in peace and love,
With me, in my bed - my escape.

I promise to take you away to a realm,
Tonight you'll enjoy dying.
Die kissing the lips of immortality,
With me in my bed - my abode.
After uploading it, I saw that the shape of this poem resembles a coffin! Spooky, eh?

My HP Poem #1958
©Atul Kaushal
Àŧùl Dec 2023
For you, I am an artist.
My art is music.
My art is love.

For you, I am a soldier.
My duty is guarding.
My duty is to protect.

You lost someone special.
I'm a new addition.
Do not worry, dear.
I'm here to stay now.
My HP Poem #1852
©Atul Kaushal
Àŧùl Dec 2023
Time brought the joyride to a halt,
Incompatibility being her prevailing issue,
She was my first love.
Even though I tried,
It all ripped apart,
Tearing in front of my eyes!

I escaped my shadow,
Of guilt and loneliness,
By inviting her to curse me.

She said, "You'll repent this,"
I replied, "Who's gonna care about it,"
She started, "You may take it lightly, but one day you're gonna fall off the hill -"
I interjected, "I'm just not gonna take it baby - chill!"
She smiled weakly, "I know that you would love again,"
I said, "No doubt about it, the world is cuter,"
She uttered her curse, "But you won't ever be satisfied!"
I invited few more curses, "Go on, come on - continue your curses!"
She went on, "You'd pay for my tears with your blood!"
I taunted, "Okay! More - just go on baby,"

She snarled, "You'll die feeling lonely in this whole wide world!
The way I find myself lonely under your possessiveness,
You too will feel unloved and unwanted."
I jeered, "Whoa! That scares me to death!"
She continued, "You just can't die so easily,"
I jeered, "Hey that's not like a curse, you can't curse so sweetly,"
She blasted to end it, "Just wait & pray for death to come early!"

True she was, the witch,
My life goes on like her curses,
How true they were!
My HP Poem #1957
©Atul Kaushal
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