Jennifer Leigh Driver
I'm 23 yrs old & poetry is something that has always stuck with me.
once when we looked to the stars
back laid back on a towel
sharing hope that love stows in its bowel
then when we looked away
spending our days in dismay
wasting our time away
telling you goodbye, just one more time
hands gripped, tears strained
hard as hell, no one to blame
car sitting, tissues ripping
your still here, but no one is listening
so much pain, no remorse
lets let depression take its course
when goodbye feels like forever..
kisses that just cant cauterize the wounds..
tears that burn like salt in cuts..
I will wait and hurt..
you will hope I don't..
I will let you down..
you will help me drown..
A darkened depth, a roaring sorrow
today I see you, though you're gone tomorrow
a vibrate glow, your smile projects
a beating heart, with no regrets
hard and lonely, a road we know
we're never ready, but here we go
a mental hunger, love neglected
high hopes, our love respected
always here, I hope you know
even with distance, I am your home
Hate, destruction, despite my pity
the hate will overcome
horrible, nasty, I'll never get this past me
horror terror, I wish you the worst
alone I will hide at home i will reside
dislike the resentment
move past the wrong
solemnly in silence,
the place I belong..
It awakens when my mind is altered
drunk and completely blacked out
the monster that cant be me
stress builds and things go without being said
so nobody know because its all in my head
just a few shots bring out the evil that cant be me
I hold it inside until I drive myself crazy
then nobody sees it coming
the monster is raging
I has to be me because I am to blame
Though I wouldn't do that if the beast were tame
I will destroy it now before it destroys me
Its mean and hateful and has no mercy
this terrible demon, by which I am damned it vain
Someone always gets hurt, though I feel the worst
The beast inside of me is driven by pain
it dwells within me and I don't know its name
all I know is it cant be me, this horrible thing
It will destroy me if I don't have control
I will lose everything, my family and home
the one that I love will finally give up
I will become what I have never wanted to be
this burden I will conquer, the beast inside of me..
These Heart felt nothings
Me left hurting
Maybe a little respect
Hate and bigotry will overcome us
I will overcome myself
I a sure a peasant would frown a pun me
Knowing that I do not appreciate
Concentrating on oneself
Being selfish and faithless
For nothing. Can save me..
I turn for pity and yet I deserve a whip
I beg for sorrow nd hell; s what fits
I found myself in the strangest place
In a world with many shades
memory erased, so overtaken
Unlike my mind before
An endless maze of thoughts
Once forever growing
Searching for a hault
Not knowing where I'm going
making up things..
focuses on what is sad..
kicks you in the ass..
reluctant to make a difference..
realizes it already does..
begins a new self..
asks for help..
lets people in..
holds nothing back..
wants to play..
anxious to win..
gets back up..
wins just enough..
A reminder through the wind blown tears..
many battles we fight through to the clear..
hopeless romance & letting go..
the friction in love, in which we devote ourselves so..
A reminder that mirror our souls through fear..
Reminders through loss of the ones we hold dear..
hurt & ache will numb us tough..
despite anything love must be enough..
when stress will wear your body down..
a world that projects the here & now..
feeling heavy keeping up..
we snap back into it..
the big picture is the only view..
a game of hit & miss..
Aroma of a man.. a scent to soothe..
a smell that makes me feel close to you..
the comfort of our pillow top.. the place I reminisce a lot..
how we'd even come to be.. a perfect match.. lucky me..
desired by the the other girls.. & I'm the one who rocks your world..
I've found the one to balance my needs.. loving every inch of me..
just your scent keeps me yearning.. due to you I'm always learning..
so very gracious to share your love.. you keep me happy no matter what..
easily we all float on.. though then my world would feel so wrong..
so very strong & nurturing.. my everything so deep in me..
I never thought I could love a man.. then everyday you prove that I can..
you are the one whom I hold so close.. my medicine in the proper dose..
no matter what life puts us through.. your my favorite color in the perfect hue..
the only one I'll ever want.. my everlasting treasure..
rapid pulse.. more than excited..
meeting you.. epiphany..
linked through mind as we are in body..
a shared life.. with man who got me..
To stand a chance in our love.. knees on the ground..
I must be enough.. head in the clouds..
a daze of worry.. the unshakable mood..
repressing my fury.. just to face you..
pours through my fingers.. unconditional love..
all of my trust..puddling up..
life runs away..to my pleasant dreams..
my head opens up.. in the night.. & seals up for the day..
sinking through the door.. staring at the door..
ripping up the blinds.. dirt under my nails..
time after time.. filing me frail..
reminiscence of our bad.. I hate the world & feel so drab..
Lingering anger.. perplexed reminders..
love in danger.. a destined timer..
warped mind.. evil.. deranged..
fake illusion.. brain contusion..
on a stage of untrue.. black curtains.. cover you..
stagnant water..unclear view.. jumping in without a clue..
changing sequence.. me on defense..
waiting for the hidden demons..
extreme caring..left to rot..
realizing what I thought was real.. was not..
distractions overtake you.. then I start to hate you..
I swear it always happens.. every single time..
entangled in you.. yet you're separated..
by your choice.. not mine..
50th years of untold perfection.
A man, the spirit of a good man, in perfect little sections.
a father whom needs no introduction.
The best in everything he is, and he only asks for nothing.
We all need him but want him to live.
hoping that I can do without him.
he does for so many and his heart is large.
and no matter the distance away i go.
we both share that special part.
its so endearing, but yet un-appearing.
no one needs to be shown. Hes humble in spirit.
he shows it through action and he'll help me mirror it.
he doesn't flaunt it or show any struggle.
he loves the hard and hates the suttle.
and hes shown me that life's not bad.
a matter of adjustment to habitat.
just be yourself and honor it.
to the best of the best. A father; a martyr.
my motivation to make life go farther.
so grateful..so glad for everything I have..
in everything and through all and all I'll be just fine..
and if i die and if you die..I'll never mind if anyone cries..
don't cry for me or anyone.. just smile for me and shine your ray..
digging deep..and feeling great..I'll love you more everyday..
and all the world will feel our rays..because love is lovely and I'm insane..
palm trees waving..people misbehaving..
While love is here..so why are we waiting..
in death there is sorrow..
we're happy now so fuck tomorrow..
love and leave..grow and achieve..
no matter the loss lost along the way..the world will love you all the same..
stringing up a tapistry..
like a spider passively..
sensory is mastery..
emotions fail me tragically..
so if I see the moonlit water..
will nacht in German be my border..
configuring the astro stars..
confiding me in something far..
many miles of spun up web..
so perfectly wrapped up & dead..
admiring a thing so sweet..
we the living, feeling grief..
fleshy fetus, then we grow..
a world so round, is all we know..
starry eyes & energy..
experience will take the lead..
Draining every drop..
to itch a certain spot..
being as i will..
never keeping still..
this is all I need..
to keep my mind in sync..
think what this will bring..
never being seen..
just a little hope..
taking that you don't..
mind will always whisper..
the things that never differ..
loathing what you fear..
will always interfere..
hold and treasure, dear..
world of hurt..
pain so pure..
down the walls..
feeling scared & suspecting..
a wayward drifter..
let me leave this fake abode..
my deepest yearning..
a broken bone..
an ugly scar..
hurting when it rains..
like a former fracture..
the limb will never be the same..
falling off a tree..
I'll run the hurt away..
although encaged in this dilemma..
I know I have to stay..
I recognize the ledge,
but I'll always hold the rope..
For when your balance falters..
I'll be your only hope..
Alone & solemn..
a sentimental probem..
resentment & hate, only fate..
breakfast morning, leaving mourning..
breathing overtakes, self absorbing..
Loving great & holding less..
Clenching more, feels depressed..
only person, feels like a juggle..
tearing heart, constant struggle..
so what if the worst really happens..
reoccuring, inevitably fastened..
I lose you & my happiness..
even through an easy mean..
I'll gleam through, a pleasant being..
so take my soul & stomp it out..
For it wont cast through everlasting doubt..
Then hate will rein & I will fade..
because truth will conquer & life will invade..
with whirly eyes, red & throbbing..
horrored sluts with their knees locking..
babies not a truthful sight..
with all infertile, feeling strive..
wondering what if all, succumbs to this..
exhaling bliss & inhaling shit..
So I'll blister for just one more lie..
humanity enduring the pain through time..
similar emotion altercations..
a lifetime of abomination..
reincarnated, into a new life..
a silly soulful prototype..
smiling sound; sonar driven
echoed back; always smitten
leave my body; floating mind
feeling sound; every time
bass vibration; settles me
simple lyrics; deep meaning
easy spirit; noise unveiling
out the window; intently gazing
there it goes; my favorite song
the perfect chance; to sing along