It's chill again.
Time to rest my head on that firm pillow of nostalgia,
Cover my shoulders with that tender blanket of desire
For ways of the past,
And to Fall into the way things were.
You're here again.
Although, you never really left us
It just wasn't your turn to carry us through the morning
(On those slow, changing leaves)
And off into a bittersweet autumn night
Take time again;
Remind me why I read.
Remind me why I wrote.
Remind me why I loved.
Remind me why I lost, (almost)
I want to be reminded, Fall.
Spring brought rain that sat heavy on the soil
Until each bead sank into the dust
It swelled the rivers, impregnating them
With fresh life and dancing currents
The lace of Queen Anne graced the hills and forests
Supple stems led to soft blooms of white
The thirsty earth swilled the cool life through summer
Longing to evade its certain decay in autumn
Yet, time passed as a breeze might
Moving rapidly: invisible and silent
Shades of emerald withered to brown
Shades of trees clutched at the banks
The water lapped at them until their fingers slipped
While the others blew about in broken bits
Gently mixing
Into the dust
You try so hard
To pick my brain
Like you pluck the strings
On your guitar
You know each note,
each chord,
each fret,
But mine are not learned as easily.
Nay, minds are not learned as easily.
A cleansing rain hit the pavement
As we filled our bodies with local flavor
I was trying to distract myself with you
But you wouldn't allow it
You pierced in your fork and opened me up
Right then and there at the table
To my surprise, I felt no pain
Only a light tingling feeling
As you whispered my name
And poured in a couple of thyme margaritas
There she is!
Oh, you can't see her?
In the corner
I swear she's there
Her black eyes
Scorching and
Enraging me
With every glare
What drives me mad the most, you ask?
Well look at her!
You'll see!
Look past those
Onyx coals for eyes
And say you don't see me
You can't!
You won't!
I never do!
It's impossible you see?
Once I get past
The pitch dark stare
All there is
Is me
Raw red scars
On porcelain cheeks
Drenched with watery emotion
Reminders
That I am still weak
Despite my mirthful commotion
Tear soaked hills
Give way under foot
Drag me to the end of the slope
Days sleeping
All nights yearned away
Proverbial words offer hope
Dreams are bliss
If you have the mind
Inhabit 'fore they fall to naught
All sorrows
Are cost to the years
Long spent frolicking without thought
Further into the disconnect we fall
Regressing in our own progression
Mindlessly chatting away the days
Painting on a new face each morning
Cinching at our waists until there is nothing left
Filling our minds with trivial gossip
Destroying friendships 1 txt msg @ a tym
Feasting on artificial flavors
Satiated with constant entertainment
Minds that never learned to think
Hearts that never learned to care
People who never learned to be human
The soft dirt covered my feet
While my fingers swirled emotions into it
I told the earth my story
Through hushed caresses on its soil
It listened better than people do sometimes
The wind brushed through my hair
While gently whispering that everything would be fine
I leaned on the trunk of a mighty oak
It held me up along with my burdens
Crawling ants tickled my legs
In a delicate attempt to make me smile
Nature took me in at that moment and I realized
That I had been a part of it all along
How did I get here?
To this place where all I can see
Are the blurred outlines of the everyday
How did I lose it?
The ability to see the bold and colorful
Passionate and limitless world around me
Am I a shell?
Not even a someone
Not even a true existence
Is it too late?
For me to prove that I am
That my perspective is valid
Where do I begin?
To gain back what I've lost
And grasp at the vastness of thought
Is the answer just that?
Thought
And meditation
Could it be that simple?
Through deep thought
To define the lines
Understand the bold
Fill in the color
Chase the passionate
Explore the limitless
And to truly exist
Yes, I think that is the only answer.
Stepping outside,
I immediately feel the Kentucky heat
Cling heavily to my body
Today, it has
Taken on a rare and thick form, I must say
It's almost tangible
It grabs at
My shoulders, while seeming to push my arms
Down against my sides
I feel the weight
Of it on my back, almost like the sky just
Couldn't hold it all anymore
I remember that summer
I was with him
You were chasing that girl
How did we meet again?
Oh, right
It was third shift
Late night chats
Turned into
Early morning "goodnights"
Turned into
Philosophical afternoons
Turned into
Me leaving him
Turned into
You forgetting her
Yes, I remember that summer
The one when I met you
A drop of coffee strays from my lips
I wipe the rim of the mug with my thumb
Then rest my head in my hand
I look out the window and notice the flowers
They are still alive in the gleaming sun
Imagine that
A brief unforced smile stretches across my face
But it leaves as quickly as it came
It had somewhere else to be
The sun is still gleaming
It makes me wonder why I don't feel
As happy as I think I should
Arms flopping to my sides,
I stare at the ceiling for some time
Dryness irritates my eyes
So, I close them
And try to think
But I can't
Knots twisting
In the stomach of a girl
Start small, with flecks of imagination,
And wrench into something more
Sinister
As her mind harps on
Twisted knots
In the stomach of a girl
Linger for hours as she sits
Waiting for answers
Wishing she could keep herself from
Ruminating on her own ideas
Terrible images
Disembogue
Making her sick
Because she has yet to gain
Control of the thoughts
That have free roam of her mind
