Hold on while I explode,
my mind is pacing,
my heart is racing.
Don't let me go,
I can't be left alone.
Your love is a light
that shines down on the darkness,
that protrudes my mind.
Your love is a guide
through the thick black forest,
of my crippled mind.
I can feel you,
when you look into my soul.
Hold on while I implode,
the feelings inside,
no where to hide.
Don't let me go,
I can't be left alone.
Your love is a beacon,
shining high upon the hill,
high above my heart.
Your love is the reason,
that I have the will,
to try and restart.
I can feel you,
you make me whole.
I can feel you,
when you look into my soul.
These simplistic,
complex feelings,
leave me floating,
touch the ceiling.
But in the end,
something will,
always be there,
to tear me down.
Hold on while I explode,
my mind is pacing,
my heart is racing.
Don't let me go,
I can't be left alone.
You never meant her any harm.
Just a helpless soul left to the your own devices.
The needles she stick in her arm,
will help her cope with this emotional crisis.
You didn't have to,
you didn't want to,
but the opportunity sure was enticing.
The softness of her skin,
could easily bend your will,
and without even knowing,
it did!
Do you feel the desire,
do you feel the fire,
burning inside,
no where to hide,
you're a liar!
When you tip-toed,
through the foyer,
and up, up, up the stairs.
Did you ever,
think to check,
for a single strand of hair!
Now your locked outside,
in the freezing cold,
no where to go.
Maybe next time,
hopefully next time,
you will think twice,
before,
you,
cheat.
On the brim of dawn,
on the battle torn fields,
where the lilacs flow,
we will never yield.
Swords may clash,
with the shield I wield,
but we will never run,
we will never yield.
Flesh meets with sword,
sword meets with shield.
Battle cries are shrieked,
we will never yield.
And when sunsets,
on this bloody, beaten field.
We will stand tall,
we will never yield.
My quiet is quite unruly,
I feel you stare right through me.
I want to walk by you dear,
but you seem so far from here.
You slip right through the crowd,
the music blaring loud.
You take me by the hand,
and show me how to dance.
I'm a fool on my feet.
So this is how,
we finally meet.
Don't let me go,
I have to know,
what exactly did I do wrong?
Before you leave,
hear my final plea,
I love you more than anything in this town,
or all around.
The night was wild,
we were on fire,
nothing could make me,
feel much higher.
How can anyone act so cool,
around me,
I'm such a fool.
We make our way home,
through the wind and cold.
The sound of sirens in streets,
drowns out our dragging feet.
I hope you are my love,
before we end,
and this night is done.
I'm lost, alone,
without a home.
Your eyes fade in and out of the skies.
My hands are cold,
without yours here.
I never want to live alone,
or in fear.
The chilling snow storm winds howl,
a cry heard around the town.
The neighborhood dogs run afoul,
not even the frostbit air can hold them down.
The streets are deserted, desolate,
street light flicker on and off.
We try to make the best of it,
a storm which we've all had enough of.
The floor creaks,
beneath my feet,
as I make my way into the den.
The walls creak,
and sound weak,
just like everything built by men.
I pick up my book,
"The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn",
the perfect read,
for when snowed in.
The time on the clock ticks,
and ticks,
and ticks,
and even clicks.
Time wasting away,
on a snowy winter day.
The cabin I'm in,
is full of sin,
lust, sodomy,
and even some mahogany.
I live in a house of hate,
a cesspool of lies.
All of which,
I will not deny.
And I will admit,
I really do miss,
your beautiful smile,
oh, it drove me wild.
But I failed you,
and you have the right to leave.
Chew me up and spit me out,
like your average piece of shit.
So I will sit here,
in this raging winter storm,
and feed the fire more,
feed the fire more.
Collapsing core's,
the seize of the soul.
Irregular hearts,
not so regular holes.
Hands intertwined,
but not with mine.
Bodies touch,
warm and kind.
I fight for you,
a fight I lose.
I go unnoticed,
you have no clue.
So in my misery, I wallow,
and I swallow,
my love for you,
into my heart, hollow.
Sinister,
the smile across her face,
as she licked her lips,
and moved with grace.
One and one together,
making one together.
A lover like this will never,
come by again.
I'm pinned,
I grin,
we sin.
Worth every moment,
every movement,
every breathe,
and then you left.
Gone,
like a sweet lullaby song,
gone.
I sit here,
still,
waiting for a wind.
A breeze, a gust,
anything.
I see my friends,
worn out,
war torn.
But I, I sit here,
still, bored.
I sway,
sometimes,
when students pass.
But the breeze soon fades,
it never lasts.
But of everything,
what keeps me going,
is when they pledge their allegiance to me.
It makes me proud to wear these colors,
and represent my great country.
I may be sad,
to be a flag,
that sits inside all day.
But I will always be proud,
to represent the U.S.A.
Breaking barriers,
beyond the brain.
A mindless mind,
is a foolish game.
Beyond the brains waves,
a smile saved.
Mother Nature grins,
we have sinned.
The chainsaws growl,
a horrific song.
Teeth tear into wood,
this feels so wrong.
Looking at a forest,
and seeing a profit.
As Frost once told,
"Nature's first green is gold."
The minds behind the mindless,
that chop, cut, and kill.
Corrupt money makers,
bending the workers will.
Will we ever yield,
turning forest into stumpy field?
Or does money dictate the mind?
Only time can tell.
The revolver,
to my head,
has one bullet.
Finger steady,
on the trigger,
I can't pull it.
The thoughts racing,
through my head,
around and around.
Head in the clouds,
please pull me down,
so my feet touch the ground.
I have always been addicted to you,
from the day you walked into the room.
Blue dress, blues eyes,
bright as the moonlight.
We kiss under the stars,
and say the world is ours.
Where did those nights go?
No one knows.
The sky,
it grows dark,
the sun hides away.
My eyes,
they grow weary,
memories fade.
As I pull,
on the trigger,
fate rings in my ears.
I smile,
cause I know,
you are somewhere near.
I have always been addicted to you,
from the day you walked into the room.
Blue dress, blues eyes,
bright as the moonlight.
We kiss under the stars,
and say the world is ours.
Where did those nights go?
No one knows.
Do you remember the first time we kissed?
I do.
It was quiet extraordinary,
the way we fell right into each others arms.
The girl with no hope,
and the boy with no faith,
tangled into each others lives.
There's not a day that goes by where I am not thinking about you.
Not a single day.
I can spend hours thinking about you,
your face.
You are so beautiful.
Everything about you radiates beauty.
From your innocent little toes,
to your smooth, soft hands,
to your cute little nose.
I try not to think of what life would be without you,
but sometimes I can't help it,
and the the thought slips into my head.
I feel my heart sink,
my body becomes numb,
as I fall into the abyss.
I want to be with you,
forever.
From now,
till the end of time.
And I promise I will always love you,
if you promise too.
Because I want my last kiss,
to be with you.
Today while I was at work,
an elderly couple came through my line.
Their faces were heavily wrinkled,
aged over time.
The man greeted me kindly,
asking for paper and plastic.
His voice was rough, raspy, and weak,
and most certainly unenthusiastic.
As I bagged his groceries,
I watched as he talked with his wife.
The woman he had to chosen to be with,
for the rest of his life.
Once we were done ringing up his food,
he reached out to pay.
His hand trembled when he extended it,
as I continued to survey.
"Debit?" he quivered with uncertainty,
as the cashier kindly took his card.
"Just confirm and sign right there." she said,
as he concentrated very hard.
Bent over slightly, eyes squinted,
he shakily signed his name.
A receipt printed, and was handed to him,
"Alright, have a great day."
I turned to the man and his wife,
and smiled as they smiled back at me.
"Thanks kid, don't work to hard!",
he said to me gleefully.
I nodded and smiled as they slowly waddled away,
and headed out the door.
I watched as they left, out of my sight, and thought,
there has to be more.
There has to be more to this measly life,
then just what I can see.
There has to be more to this pathetic life,
which means nothing to me.
The thought of death, it scares me so,
and leaves me shaking in fear.
My mind is clouded, thoughts a blur,
nothing seems to be clear.
The thought that someday when I'm old,
I'll wake up and think to myself,
"Welp, this is the end of the line,"
is really something else.
Because to be quite honest, I don't want to have to think,
"this is the final stretch."
I would rather not have to confront,
such an evil as death.
I don't want to face a wrinkled face,
brittle bones and a deteriorated mind.
I don't want to grow old, or die alone,
or face the powerful Father Time.
But then I remember what I saw today,
and it makes me realize how I will survive.
The man had a love, his wife, his soul mate,
which kept him alive all along.
So I will face my wrinkled face,
and I will face brittle bones.
I will face my deteriorating mind,
and I won't face them alone.
I will love you all my life,
and I will make you my wife.
And we will fight Father Time,
together, side by side.
It's been five years now.
Five years flew by,
five years into thin air,
five years forever gone.
I cannot remember a time,
where I felt more anger,
hatred,
disgust.
I carry these emotions still with me to this very day,
in hope that I will someday wake up,
and no longer feel them.
Sometimes I find myself waking in the night,
calling your name,
reaching out for you,
only to feel cold sheets on the other side.
I write this to you now,
not because I am lonely,
not because I am desperate,
but because I love you.
No matter how much hatred I feel,
I always will love you.
The frigid winter air,
has confined me to my home,
where my mind if left to roam.
Miles away,
in my haven,
my mind begins to cave in.
The simplicity,
of this disease,
it picks me apart,
tears at my heart,
and mangles my mind.
It distorts all perception,
leading to my own deception,
I ask myself,
when is this going to end?
I feel nothing,
other than confusion.
And I can’t stop fighting,
this battle, which I am losing.
My mind pulls me one way,
my heart, the other,
And I can’t help but feel,
like I’m being smothered.
I scream,
and I cry,
and I still don’t know why,
I can’t feel normal.
I escape,
and I run,
right into a loaded gun,
that blows me to bits.
It blows me to bits.
I slowly submit.
I quietly submit.
I quit.
Walking by the riverbed,
drowning my thoughts,
and regrets.
Rocks sink quickly,
like my heart,
ever since,
you chose to depart.
Never again,
I cannot swim.
Been searchin’ for,
a light to hold,
and wane away the darkness a little more.
Stars grow dim,
like the tunnel entrance,
slipping further away,
disconnected romance.
Never again,
I cannot see.
The night is cold,
the frost is thick,
and I am growing old.
My fingers and face,
have become numb,
like my weak heart,
when we’re not one.
Never again,
I cannot feel.
The world has gone gray,
an empty canvas abandoned,
when did you even go astray?
Everything seems like nothing,
colorblind to the emotions around,
like a dog trying to define a rainbow,
or the deaf’s hope of enjoying a sound.
Never again,
I cannot hear.
War torn,
my heart cries,
like a newborn.
And like a newborn,
I have become immature,
to what love truly is,
you have distorted my perception,
forever.
Never again,
I cannot love.
I am industrialized,
I have bloodshot eyes.
I love the sound of machine,
I love dough, moolah, green.
I will kill because I’m told to,
I will do things I'm told not to do.
I will lie, cheat, and steal,
I no longer truly feel.
I rape and I kill,
I never get my fill.
I’m a big fan of gore,
I always want more.
I feed on anger and hate,
I charge everyone with such high rates.
I will fight those who will not defend,
I love killing my fellow men.
I can kill every living thing,
I can win millions if I could learn to sing.
I never regret the decisions I've made,
I only want to get laid.
I will murder for love,
I will strive for a way above.
I am the definition of insanity,
I love sex and profanity.
My own life slips through my hands,
like grains of sand,
I am man.
Sons of the sun,
come together as one.
Fester and boil,
melt into the soil.
Fertilize our mother Earth,
our crutch since our birth.
The birth of man began the end,
for man and Mother Nature are not friends.
Modern day industry saturates our minds,
with pretty toys and fancy cars alike.
We feed into the killers, as Mother Nature dies,
our bodies and our minds, both industrialized.
That's why I plea,
for the sake of you and me,
sons of the sun,
come together as one.
Fester and boil,
melt into the soil,
and save us all.
The stink of flesh and bone,
burned for a great unknown.
Torn skin and bloodied bruises,
the man with the least faith loses.
Bullets tearing through the air,
leaving behind death and despair.
Explosions lighting up the streets,
can you feel the heat?
We feast on the fight,
in the middle of the night.
But cry foul play when the enemy reacts,
to our previous attack.
Bombs filled with money,
isn't it funny?
We pay for the gore,
yet deny we love war.
Organs lay spread across the street,
decorating the battlefield.
We harvest the souls of the enemy,
with the weapons we wield.
The dust and rubble fly,
as bombs fall from the sky.
Innocent people die,
innocent babies cry.
We feast on the fight,
in the middle of the night.
But cry foul play when the enemy reacts,
to our previous attack.
Bombs filled with money,
isn't it funny?
We pay for the gore,
yet deny we love war.
Bullets,
bombs,
and blasphemy.
Money bombs,
money gone.
Bombs filled with money,
isn't it funny?
We pay for the gore,
yet deny we love war.
We love gore,
we love whores,
money gone,
we love war!
Listen woman,
I ain't no toy.
Listen closely now,
I ain't your boy.
Do you hear me?
Hear me loud and clear.
Listen woman,
don't wanna see you here.
I'm done with you,
be done with me,
no one likes a psycho,
no one likes crazy.
Did you hear?
I want you gone.
Listen up,
I want you out by dawn.
Hey woman,
you're sounding crazy.
And I won't,
let you be crazy with me.
I'm done with you,
be done with me,
no one likes a psycho,
no one likes crazy.
Get out of my hair,
get out of my face,
get off my back,
get out of my space!
Sometimes I wonder,
what makes you tick?
What makes you feel?
And when will it click,
in your beautiful head,
that I loved you?
I've been faithful,
and I've been strong.
They say four months,
isn't that long,
but to me,
it felt like an eternity.
I sit and ponder,
now that you're gone,
what exactly happened,
what I did wrong,
to make you, of all people,
hate me.
I will sit here,
for the rest of my days,
till I find out what I did,
to push you away.
No matter how long it takes,
I will wait.
