I have another website to where I post my poems, stories, etc.
2013: My old poetry absolutely SUCKS.
I've matured a bit since then.
Check it out: http://scribd.com/Joshua_Phelps
Silence washes over him,
His mind wanders, thoughts processing,
“Will my comrades make it out alive?”
He exchanges glances around the crowd while
Blending in, trying to go unnoticed.
It all turns to hell when
He hears a gunshot fifty feet away.
Everybody runs for cover,
Local authorities take action,
He leaves them carrying on their own, searching for the source,
Only to come across an empty lead, with the assailant escaping in a fraction.
He continues trekking along the freshly vacated area with clenched fist.
Minutes later…A glint in his eyes he finds perturbing
the reflective, temporarily mesmerizing light, aggravating,
Causes him to stop in his tracks to discover the origin.
Several steps ahead,
He comes to an abrupt halt
As he spots the target semi-hidden.
A piece of clothing by the side as evidence,
A broken mirror with a message written in blood,
Announcing the other side has captured one of his companions.
Listening to the cadence of his heart increase,
Animosity rising with eyesight growing weak.
He strikes the glass with a resounding blow.
The remnants cascade around his hand,
A few embedding underneath the skin.
The pain registers as the man emits a low grow within.
“Mark my words,” he snarls with teeth bared, “Once I find you, I'll kill you. I'll tear you limb from limb, bone from bone. Don't you dare harm my friend.”
This isn't the beginning or the end.
The hunt is on, the battle's over, but…
The war has only just begun.
Moments later he finds out they have captured a teammate that he has feelings for.
Will he rescue the victim?
Continued in the crossover codenamed, “Missing.”
Part one: http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-1/
Part two: http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-2/
Part three: http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-iii/
Part four: http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-iv/
“God damn it, tell me what happened!” The man stationed northbound patches through the feed,
Interpreting the profanity, the distress call emitting from a faraway subject, sound quickly fading as a mistake truly not meant to happen takes place. “Alpha, beta! Answer me!”
With grief-stricken pang in the accuser's heart, he soon answers with the hidden undertone of contrition laced with sorrow, “I killed one of their men. I didn't mean to. He...I-”
“Get out there safely,” He interjects, opening the door, checking twice as he walks out. “I'll meet you at the base.”
“I thought we were supposed to rescue you?”
The man shakes his head,“It's you that needs saving. They've probably called backup. Back out now before the big guns arrive.”
He removes the communicator, throws the device to the ground,
Smashing it to oblivion, glancing around.
Quickly regaining composure, he
Takes off swiftly, moving with such ferocity
Pushing his body to the limits, as he makes his way to the center of the city.
Part two: http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-2/
Part three (team mates POV): http://hellopoetry.com/poem/the-hunt-pt-iii/
Part V eta: Soon.
Pt. 1 – Conclusion
Although I've told you:
“I can't make it out alone, I can't fight on my own.
I can't fix myself, I can't go on.”
I have to go forward in the front lines of war,
Protect myself from harm, and alarm others
Before I start to release the beast inside.
I have lost my faith before,
I have doubts about living.
I may let my past affect me when
I reach my lowest point.
One thing that's remained... is my integrity.
Yea, it's been on shaky terrain. (I'm not the only one to tell a tall-tale.)
I'm unique. I'm rare. For one to admit their faults at such a young age,
Takes more bravery than one could imagine.
You all didn't ask for a taste,
But I gave you every single drop.
I'm not made of stone,
I'm not fake. I'm genuine.
I mess up,
I assess the problem,
Analyze, discuss conversations in my head.
I admit, I'll confess
I'll come to a conclusion that
Most issues cannot be fixed.
Then I end up at the crossroads. (Don't turn back.)
“I should ignore. I should just walk out.”
Eventually, I'll relent and douse the fire,
Watch it dwindle, watch the smoke takes its course.
I'll memorize, but go on with a subtle amount of regret.
I'll take the right turn, taking precaution not to get burned again.
I'm certain this is the last you'll hear of me. I've spoken way too much.
I won't be dead, I won't take my life. I needed to get this off my chest.
You may say it's a step backwards,
Showcasing myself to the public.
You are wrong.
In fact, I've never felt more alive.
Pt. I – Concept of Life
On and on, I must reiterate the words I've said day by day,
To assure myself I'm sane.
Repeat meaningless dreams like a movie stuck in an endless loop,
About the good moments and the bad, the bad and the worse.
Carrying on throughout the day, with pain evident on my face.
I tell myself I don't want to be here anymore. (Maybe I'm not strong enough.)
I fought back the deepest thoughts, but they manage to scratch the surface.
I'm struggling with the concept of life.
Pt. II – Doubt.
I have doubts.
Doubts about my purpose in this world. (Do I belong?)
Doubts about my future, if I'll ever succeed in this vicious society. (Will I make it out alive?)
I've broken down the fourth wall, more than a year
Since I opened the doors for all to judge. Step one to becoming a better person,
Step two to destroying the man I never was.
Seems like everybody is peering in, finding ways to exploit my weakness.
Then I realize it's not them.
Pt. III – Unstable.
I wear my heart on my sleeve.
I'm easily wounded. (Always was.)
What words are said, affect me.
I realize I must ignore, but years of suffering,
Taking it all in...I've reached my breaking point.
I've been used.
I couldn't take it, I was sick of being pushed over.
Stepped on, treated like I would never amount to anything.
I felt that the one's close to me didn't expect me to make something of my life.
Shortly after, I couldn't contain my overwhelming emotions. I lashed out in all directions.
I was seeing with red eyes.
Pt. IV – The Breakdown
I didn't care about my actions, or what led me to them.
So I turned to drugs.
Many factors contributed, but depression was a start.
I was in denial. Accepted I had a problem, yet continued line by line,
Causing mayhem along the way.
Then my quick fix withered, euphoric sensation washing away.
I sobered up completely. Fell off the tracks temporarily.
Picked myself up, rose above the ashes.
Only to have the people around with menacing stares, walk on past me.
Pt. V – Disassemble, Reassemble.
Here I am, present day – I'm keeping my head up,
I know I don't deserve respect, considering all I've done...
I don't expect you to show compassion.
I'm hoping I have a chance to be forgiven.
I've torn myself apart for all to see.
Now it's time I moved on,
Build myself back up from ground zero.
It's time I faced society with a brave face
And stop living my life with remorse...
Pt. VI – The Masquerader
...What am I saying?
Empty words, promises.
I fool those around me with blatant lies, saying,
“Everything is fine. I'm all right.”
To be honest: I've got to where I can't fix myself.
I end up relying upon others.
But no one is here.
No arms to envelop me.
No shoulder to lean on.
I'm trapped in solitary confinement.
Pt. VII – Reclusion.
I sit in my room, in an empty spot,
Wiping the tears from my face.
Silently wanting comfort, praying
The hours would speed up in to days.
I'm aware it's not everyone's fault.
I've done this to myself.
I can't go on with a second mask,
Living life like I'm lost in a masquerade.
What can I do?
Is there anybody who will save me?
Pt. VIII – Faith.
Does God exist or am I all alone?
I question my faith. I used to believe.
Where was God when I needed him?
Where was he when I was bleeding?
Where was he when I overdosed?
I don't know. Am I lucky? Or is it a miracle?
Sometimes I feel there's an angel guarding me.
How I managed to survive is beyond inquiry.
I shouldn't be here. I came close to dying.
Is life worth a second shot? Is it worth trying?
I'm still present. I guess I have to...
Have to keep fighting.
I have more to write in Concept of Life, Pt. II.
Right now....I'm about to cry.
Thanks for reading.
Grasp my hand. I got you, I'm not going to let you fall.
Don't let your eyes avert mine,
Keep steady, don't be afraid.
It will be okay.
You're not going plummet to your death.
I won't let the darkness enshroud, encompass your body.
We're only a few thousand feet above ground level,
Whether you determine this as bad, I feel as we're closer to heaven.
Darling, hold on tightly, I'll lift you up.
Feel the arctic air caress your face,
Chilling, exhilarating, adrenaline pumping
As we venture out the trap you almost fell in.
Stick with me and we'll climb to the top of the mountain.
We have a mile left, you'll make it, I guarantee it.
I told you I won't let you go when we first met.
And I've committed to being by your side ever since.
Follow me to the highest peak. Once we're there,
We'll hold our arms out towards the sky,
Pretending we've ascended to Utopia.
We'll celebrate our success before dawn.
Head out before the frigid weather takes control,
And I'll plant a kiss upon your lips, as we take the path leading to our home.
You want to know the real me.
Be my friend. Be my crutch when I need support.
I've said it before and I'll say it again...
I'll let you in. All you have to is ask.
I'm no stranger when you see what's inside my head.
I may be confused, delusional, and a little dangerous.
Look closely and you'll find the better part of me.
You may like it, you may not, but if you don't cross that barrier
You'll never get to find out who I really am.
Unless you take the invitation, you won't get the chance to discover that:
I am weak, I am strong.
I am talented, I am wrong.
I'm a paradox, I'm part of the demented.
I'm both optimistic and pessimistic.
I am extraordinary, I'm blessed with an altruistic heart.
I'm able to attentively listen with an open mind, open arms.
Able to discern what's really bothering you, before you start speaking.
Able to make you smile without purposely meaning.
I am everything and all the above, not quite human, but well enough.
I could be the greatest person in history.
What you see is a sample,
A taste, an example.
If you want to discover more,
I am incredible.
“We've only got one shot. One chance of getting him out of there alive.”
The brunette with piercing green eyes, guides
her team. All six veering off in opposing directions,
avoiding the men who once fired on their comrade in hiding.
“Alpha squad to beta, close in on target on countdown. Lone ranger, hold tight. We're almost there.”
Each member nods in compliance. A faint voice registers through the communicator, telling them all he's fine.
“Live carelessly or die trying...” One shadowy figure emerges, glaring at the main unit. “Either way, we're just getting started. Ready for this guys?” He flashes a quick grin before heading with the others.
They all freeze, taking their stances. On guard, on hold.
“Hold your positions!”
“Three... Don't make a sound.”
“Two.... Don't turn around.”
“One.... Your main goal is to surround the enemy. And don't let your teammates down.”
Caught by surprise,
The gunmen attack, put up a minute-long fight
only to get knocked unconscious all at once, with another shooter
descending three stories below.
A tragic flaw in a plan go wrong.
The masked man falls to his death, blood pouring from every angle.
Seconds slow down to what seems like an hour,
As each surrounding member stares in shock, in horror...each person
turning to the being obscured by the dark, the individual held accountable.
“I told you no dead casualties!” The woman yells to the man responsible. “We don't kill! Got it?”
“I didn't mean...”
“Tell that to the guy you just murdered!”
Incoherently swearing, he turns back with shaky hands saying, “What have I done?”
Forgive me if I neglect you.
I am trying to clear my head.
I don’t despise you.
My reason is I can’t continue suffering. They’ve moved on. Why can’t I?
It’s been over a year. Imprinted in time, your ashes kept alive.
Your body placed to rest, your loved ones living a lie.
I kept busy, kept myself in denial
so that I could live in comfort and peace
Then reality struck me like a brick wall
and I fell down, weeping for my loss.
I replaced grieving with regret.
Committed acts I never imagined let set
Months progressed, I have repaired,
Repressed the memory to forget -
Only to have it come back around with a stronger hit.
I want you to know I have always cared about you.
I…I wish I could have been a better person,
but I pulled away, and you left the world without a warning.
To this present day,
more than a year since I laid my eyes on
the body resting in calm repose,
my heart continues to ache immensely.
I assure myself I must go on. I need to let go.
Just promise me you’ll remember me.
Your passing has me living under a dark cloud;
please forgive me if I forget you right now.
"Your plots foiled. I'm on alert, on guard. Whatever you have under your sleeve, you're not going to trick me. I got you where I want you,
Make any sudden movements and suffer the consequences."
"Like you can stop me.”
Here we go again, the war’s raging on.
The adversary’s teammates clamber atop the building,
Those already on the ledge focusing their weapons at you.
He gets up, wincing as he puts weight on his shattered ankle.
You get into fighting position, recognising your attempt to survive would be
Damn-near problematic, impossible.
“You’re defeated”, his frown morphing to a sneer, “Prepare to die.” Instantaneously, his army begins firing away.
You close your eyes, time decelerating as you hear the trigger being pulled.
You search for the solution, the answer returns deluded.
As you whisper a prayer, you hesitate and go for option number two: act upon instinct.
“Somebody help me!” You say, running, avoiding the hollow-point bullets.
Each bloke above curses, one shouting “Get him!” as you barely evade,
Narrowly fleeing to a discarded alleyway.
The communicator in your ear goes off, a barely inaudible message that your plea was received.
Help is on the way.
You glance to the left, to the right, before breaking a window and climbing inside.
“I will not die tonight.”
I catch you staring far below,
Eyes set to kill, revenge boiling in your veins
Clenched fist in frustration – fueled by hate.
Were you expecting me to run? Do not give in yet.
It has only just begun.
If you want a game, have at it.
I'll be the predator, and you the animal.
I'll switch the roles, jump off the balcony,
Witness your expression change,
You just as perplexed as I
When I miraculously survived the feat,
Seeing your reaction changing
From confusion to alert,
I quickly catch you off guard, managing
To fracture a bone or two. Inflicting, damaging,
Exhilarating, frightening – I hold myself back.
Witnessing you howling in pain,
I shrug, as it wasn’t a personal gain.
You wanted a fight. I gave you a fight. Stand down.
I’m not here to kill you, but I can’t say the same for you.
You’ve been tracking me for ages.
I expected this to be a challenge.
Is it a ruse to catch me off guard?
Is it a game you’re playing to have your men corner me?
Bring it on. I’m not scared.
After all, this is the first part of your plan.
Part one of “The Hunt.”
I got a word to say, tell all your friends
You toss me under.
They threw me back out.
I'm determined to take you down.
You want to dissemble my self-worth?
Make me less of what I already am?
I got a clever way of dealing with this.
Rather than use a direct approach, blunt force,
Let's settle the score.
Not in the way you expected.
I'll drive you mad.
Drive you crazy.
You'll wish you were dead.
When I said I'll even the numbers, leave it at a tie...
I didn't specify – you want me to project violence,
Did I forget to tell you I have a new plan?
Don't hesitate to punch a brick wall and
Don't forget to head towards the exit.
Here's the plan: I'm not going to hit you.
And these are my wise words:
It takes a coward to fight a fool,
A man to leave the duel.
The only moment violence is appropriate in the slightest is:
When lives are at stake, is the right moment to lay a fist.
But when it comes to petty argument, it's best to lay it to rest.
What's left to say:
Good riddance, goodbye.
Kick yourself out the door. I don't have time for this.
I'm done, I've said all that's to be spoken.
You got your clarity in the end and I
left with your dignity. End of story.
for a person I swear I am not.
You all get the impression I
live a life with two faces.
I am true to myself,
not much to others.
That is all there is to it.
I am a man, with the inability
to put reliance in a familiar
Person, one whom I could relate.
Don’t blame it on me,
Look at yourself. Were you there,
when I needed you most?
…you weren’t there at all.
The ones closest to me,
took it as a cry of desperation,
an attention-seeking plea.
What if there is an underlying problem?
Did they think I was worth listening to for one second?
Taken for granted,
they ignored it,
what shouldn’t have happened.
I am only a human with issues,
I’m left to solve, a human with problems,
left to figure out alone.
Who do I turn to,
when I am the only one around?
I wonder why I continue to breathe.
What is my reason, if the seasons pass me by?
a blur moving slowly, remind me,
Of the faults I’ve created …
… almost leads me to temptation,
the one promise I’m barely containing;
What’s the point in looking forward to a brand new day?
Unable to profess without judgment,
I have no other choice,
but to lock my heart in my chest.
Implicating the burdens tackled, and experienced
are completely my fault.
Conclusion leading to guessing that is right: I deserve this.
Years and years of mistakes,
I remain the unchanged.
departing to another place
...I miss the old days.
I can’t bring it back
nothing really stays the same
I am closer to forgetting
my conscious get the best of me.
Today, it has led me to
Tomorrow, it will lead me
to a deluge of cold-blooded thoughts.
back to dreading
Wishing I could simply
Never have I felt…
You had better run before it is too late.
Keep running your mouth, and this conversation
Will have a completely differently take.
I assumed you had complete control...
Figured out they were really
Plotting against you,
For the cue word to strike.
I suggest you go under cover
As your in-crowd just turned into
Your most feared living nightmare.
You appear as if you spoke so clearly,
Yet they project malevolence, surely
...you are naïve
You helped spread this disease.
Hide, quickly now.
You’re at fault, man-made catastrophe.
I will not be here to protect you against harm,
I have matters to attend to,
You’re on your own.
When I make my grand escape...
I'll glance back, sending an inaudible whisper your way.
"I pray you never see the light of day. May your soul suffer without resting in calm repose."
And I will set forth,
Erasing the memory,
The calamity of today.
While you thrash and scream,
Wishing it was all a dream...
The underlying messages you are trying to hide,
displaying tension in the most enigmatic approach,
my mind, solving, and portraying what you meant to say
You say it’s ideal we separate,
Brilliant that you kept it hidden,
a hole in my heart you currently made
a void I am forced to fill-in.
Where can I go?
You haven’t told me.
Sweetheart, there’s no need.
You’re trembling, I’m shaking.
Our young love
Matured to the point
of split division between
one grown woman and a fool.
“I’m heading out.” I mumble,
automatically pushing my legs,
“Do you have a place to stay?”
“I have no home to reside at, nobody to talk to.
I’m frustrated, but not at you.”
“…I used to love you. I…I need time to think.”
We both once felt the same.
“I’ll give you your space.”
Tomorrow, I doubt you’ll remember my name.
Don’t stare below,
The heights to a higher place affright you.
The ground shook, the air frigid,
the people stood in shock,.
you kept your balance.
you threaten to descend,
they send a plea,
begging you to ascend.
The others, calling you
to step off the ledge.
We’re not fools.
This isn’t a test,
We’re sorry you let your guard down,
Don’t let this get to you.
You’re not misplaced.
Risking your life,
Benefiting the satisfaction of others;
Won’t solve your problem.
Evaluate before you subjugate.
From your distance,
They’re just little specks in the concrete.
The limit is the sky.
You can become what your heart desires.
I’m cognisant of the stranger’s honest opinion,
They barely know who you are. They say what they’ve said before.
Why not change it?
Show them you’re incredible.
Prove to them you’re not a failure, be their friend - not their foe.
Explain to them what brought you this far,
I’m sure they’ll be happy to assist,
Give you a helping hand.
Take your time, I’ll be waiting.
When I turn back around,
I expect you to come back to me.
We all care, dear. It just takes a moment to find out.
To put your faith back and restore your trust.
We all have a purpose, you just have to set out and discover your own.
Gather children, come forth to me.
Our lesson, wrapped in a mystery.
Our mission, finding what we once held.
Uncovered as we close in on danger.
Borders will be trampled upon,
Our weapons shall raise.
Signifying a revolt,
Proclaiming our freedom.
We won't stumble,
We won't fall.
Our courage radiates, our bravery shows.
We're the founder's of a new democracy.
Join us, or get out of the way.
Run back to your homes if you're not going to stay.
It's difficult fighting with you dragging us down.
Release the hatred.
We've kept quiet for years,
Wept in silence,
Blood mixed with our tears.
End your reign,
You've put us to shame.
Failure to comply,
Failure to adhere to our request.
Our course of action sentencing you under the barrel of our guns,
See what you did to us?
You turned us into vigilantes.
You twisted the law,
We took it in to our own hands.
Go on, muster the strength
Try to escape. You can't.
Say goodbye, whisper a chant.
As the final pull of the trigger,
Sends you to never-never land.
"It's best we make it count."
"Mean what you say."
You beckon him to speak up.
He waits for you to make the first move.
The forgotten dialogue left unspoken,
Your clenched fist,
his hands begin pulling you in.
His first kiss, your dream come true.
His fantasy unveiled. Your harbouring adoration revealed.
The sensual touch,
The warmth, spreading like fire.
A comforting, welcoming addition.
You lose track of reality.
That's fine by him, by you.
You pull back,
Greeted by his glistening eyes.
He whispers the words,
Three little words.
And you know
You don't have to repeat it.
He understands wholeheartedly.
No need in giving him the satisfaction,
When he's got you in his arms.
And that's all you ever wanted.
That's all you ever need.
He doesn't need to hear it,
When he figured you out.
Your main priority.
You tell him it's not over,
He wants this to continue,
And you want more.
His guess less than three words.
You nod in approval.
He coins the term, "lovers",
As he places his lips back to yours.
A fraction of a second, you called my name.
This rope, cut free from the time I've spent with you, remembering the promise of being together forever.
All that you had to give me when I was at fault, when I was the one who kept you up at night. When I was the one who fought the fight, you remained persistent through it all.
Waiting for the phone call,
Knowing that if I come back,
You'd relieve yourself of despair.
Spreading like a virus,
the predicament you wished you'd never have to face.
Broadcast over a series you wished you haven't watched or set eyes upon.
While you were waiting at the doorstep to resolve the situation,
He was displaced, immersed in the river before you could come to realisation.
You exhaled, breathing in the life you're so lucky to have,
Mourning over the thought of one more day without him.
You could have changed the past.
Reversed the roles of right and wrong.
Tell him, that through it all, he's still your serenading song,
Before you left him on the roadside.
Poison love, holding you close.
Whispering gently, the words were never meant to hurt so softly.
Empowering thoughts, bringing out the best in you.
You reach out, confessing to all you owned to.
"No!", you screamed when you felt broken, violated.
"Ignite!", you heard as you felt the walls tumble by ash & fire.
"Worthless.", they hissed when you fell through the lifeless pit.
"Forgive me.", you pleaded. Promising words guiding the life of you.
The test, redemption.
And they say:
"Here us lying, watch you hiding.
Here us walking, you come crawling.
Here us talking, listen to your reasoning."
Ignorance they speak of, honesty you crave existing nowhere.
What has come forth, he'll never know.
What's been questioned, he won't find out.
Concluding, realising, waking up to find:
His life, tainted memories.
A trial by error.